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The Fighting Vapourbots Association League!
OK, a mini bump of sorts, but I was sorting my computer out and found Round One: Heat D of this!
HEAT D: MELEE ONE
Leprosy Infection vs. The Quaestor III vs. Turbo Tails vs. Apocalypse
From Suffolk, LEPROSY INFECTION!
Is here to infect YOU with a lethal vertical spinning drum capable of reaching 4000RPM, powered by the same motors Robot Wars runner up Storm II used for drive, wowsers! Capable of a top speed of 18mph this infection can spread like wildfire, but with exposed wheels and vulnerable axes, will the other machines be the antidote for Leprosy Infection?
From Pontefract, THE QUAESTOR III!
From ancient Rome, The Quaestor has come to fight for vengeance! Armed with a deadly pneumatic axe and a front lifting wedge, this robot is well weaponed. The armour isnt shabby either: a mixture of Hardox, Aluminium and Steel giving this machine good overall protection. A potential top speed of 25mph makes The Quaestor the fastest in the melee, but could that top speed leave The Quaestor ROMAN around the arena and out of control?
From Glasgow, TURBO TAILS!
Awww, how cute its a little fox, but dont let looks deceive you in the arena - this fox isn€™t as cuddly as it looks! Low, sleek, agile, well armoured, this looks a good robot. A front flipper and rear spinning blade gives this fox plenty of bite, the body protected with Hardox and... FUR? Hmmm, flambed fox, anyone?
From Cardiff, APOCALYPSE!
Watch out, boyo, the end of the world is approaching... in the form of Apocalypse! A low fearsome flipping machine, capable of tossing machines roughly 8ft into the air, and hopefully out of the arena! Strong armouring and 6 wheel drive means this robot can certainly make its force known in the arena, but with limited CO2 on board could it be Apocalypse N-Owww!!
Roboteers, Stand By!
The house robots this evening - he may be endangered, but he€™s here to prove that not all panda€™s are cuddly, it€™s Panda-Mick! And joining him tonight is the one and only, the most Psycho-est Psycho in Psycholand€¦ it€™s Mr Psycho!
Booth One: Joey McConnell and the rest of Team Chevron, and Steve McGregor and his little band of minions that represent Team BraveHeart.
Booth Two: Liam Eliot and Team Welsh Warlords, and Team Dino Warriors, captained, as ever, by Christopher Mason.
3€¦2€¦1€¦ACTIVATE!
And the first fight of Heat D gets underway, Leprosy Infection already getting its spinning drum whirring up to its top speed as it darts towards the centre of the arena, smashing head first into the oncoming Turbo Tails. Steve McGregor winces as the drum starts chewing up some of the delicious yellow fur, but Chris Mason, apprehensive about the drum getting clogged, quickly reverses out of the way. The Quaestor III brings its axe into play, *THWACK!*, scoring a hit onto the top of the reversing Leprosy Infection and putting a small dent into the 7mm Titanium armouring. Apocalypse doesnt want to be left out in the cold, and drives straight under the 8mm side ground clearance of Turbo Tails before launching it into the air! *FLIP!* The flying fox doesnt seem to fly for long though, as it comes crashing towards the centre of the arena and bounces off the arena floor, the fur ripped and exposing the Hardox armour underneath. Turbo Tails quickly self rights with the front hinged flipper, and immediately gets on the attack with the spinning blade, attempting to get revenge on Leprosy Infection after its initial onslaught. Apocalypse turns its attention to The Quaestor III, and tries to get the front wedge underneath. However it is the machine from Pontefract that gets the upper hand, its front wedge sliding underneath and allowing the axe to come down, hoping to penetrate the 4mm Hardox front face. *THWACK!* Apocalypses armour withstands the axe blow, but is flipped over quite swiftly by the flipping mechanism embedded in The Quaestors front wedge, exposing the weak Titanium base-plate. The axe comes down again, *THWACK!* this time easily getting through the armour and stopping Apocalypse from self righting efficiently.
Leprosy Infection, meanwhile, has managed to rip a tiny bit of fur off of Turbo Tails, the trophy piece whirling around the drum like a yellow blur, but not slowing the drum down. Chris Mason drives his Leprosy Infection machine forwards again to cause more damage, but Steve McGregor has sensed what was about to happen, and quickly spins Turbo Tails around, bringing the horizontal spinning axes into play. *CLASSSSH!*
The audience wince as both spinners collide, an explosion of sparks flooding the arena, both machines engulfed in a firework of bright white sparks, then flung to the opposite sides of the arena by the sheer force. Leprosy Infection skids into the arena side wall, narrowly avoiding crashing into the spinning flywheels, but the drum appears to have stopped spinning altogether... as has Turbo Tails spinning blade! Both spinning weapons have been disabled after that tremendous clout! Chris looks unphased, as he drives a now weaponless Leprosy Infection towards The Quaestor III and Apocalypse, the latter managing to self right after Refbot gave Joey McConnells machine a little nudge to release the axe! A slam from Leprosy Infection lets Apocalypse know that there are now two robots ganging up on him, the power in the S28-400 MagMotors pushing Apocalypse into the side wall and on the edge of Panda-Micks CPZ! *CRRRUNCH!*
The camera pans up to Steve McGregor, who looks down-trodden and jolly well annoyed - Turbo Tails has remained ever so statuesque since that huge collision with Leprosy Infection. The fur, tattered and torn in places and a small trail of smoke billowing out from the back of Turbo Tails signals that it is out of the melee and out of the competition. Refbot counts out the fox from Glasgow, Mr Psycho impatiently waiting to feed on the carcass.
8...9...10! *BEEEEEEP!*
The timer has barely reached the magic number 10 before Mr Psycho grapples the poor, tragic Turbo Tails, the huge claw buckling the Hardox armour and destroying the chassis. Psycho trundles over to the flame pit, the flames leaping out and setting the yellow fur on Turbo Tails alight, like some cheap firework! The flaming machine, lifted up for the whole audience to see, is helpless as Mr Psycho parades it around the arena before dumping it like a piece of rubbish onto the arena floor flipper. Refbot quickly scoots over, fire extinguisher in hand to douse the flames on Turbo Tails, just as *WHOOOOSH!* the floor flipper fires, sending the fox flying through the air for the second time in this fight, bouncing off the floor and, in a move the British Gymnastics Team would be proud of, over the arena wall, landing on the floor below straight onto its wheels. The audience whoop and holler, as the number of contestants in this opening melee have been reduced by one.
Back in the arena, Apocalypse, still overcoming the slam into the arena wall from Leprosy Infection, comes back on the attack against the machine from Suffolk, sliding underneath the ground clearance and the static drum at the front and flipping it into the air! Leprosy comes back down to earth with a bang, smashing into the steel floor, the Titanium armouring looking buckled and crumbled on collision. Joey looks to get this battle over and done with, as he drives The Quaestor III towards the pit release button, carefully avoiding Mr Psycho in the process. Bits of flamey fur litter the arena floor as Leprosy Infection, tenacious as ever, slams into Apocalypse once again, this time managing to avoid the front wedge and crash into the side, pushing its prey towards the arena flywheels mounted on the side walls! A humungous CRASSSSH! deafens the whole arena, as the force of the slam not only disables the flywheel, but sends the Hardox side panel of Apocalypse careering into the centre of the arena! *CLANG!*
The innards of Apocalypse are exposed, just as the siren wails, announcing to all that the pit is descending. Chris valiantly keeps the pressure on, as Apocalypse, unable to get the flipper into play, is helpless! The Quaestor rushes down the arena, trying to get in on the action, and does so with another huge *THWACK!* with the axe on Leprosy Infection, the armouring really taking a battering here today! Liam, flustered and desperate to get away from the side wall, fires the flipper, the front of the machine raising off the ground and allowing Leprosy Infection to get underneath the Cardiff-based-bot every so slightly. The Quaestor also manages to get under, and fires its lifting device. Apocalypse is sent over onto its back, but not for long, as Liam immediately self rights in style, a clean 360 degree flip back onto its wheels, but sadly directly back onto the wedge of The Quaestor. The axe comes down, not damaging the Hardox armour but holding its prey tightly, as it heads towards the pit. Chris Mason backs off, completely aware of what Joey is aiming to do. Liam fires the flipper again, hoping to free itself from The Quaestors clutches, but to no avail, as Joey quickly brakes before reaching the pit. *POOOOOOF!* Apocalypse slowly slides off the front wedge and directly into oblivion, submerged in a cloud of thick white smoke!
CEASE!!
Steve goes home with his Turbo Tails between his legs, and Apocalypse failed to bring impending doom to this arena!
Leprosy Infection and The Quaestor III go through to Round Two!
HEAT D: MELEE TWO
Wedginator Devilution vs. Masamune vs. Baldur Gamma vs. *69
From Toronto, WEDGINATOR DEVILUTION!
Green and scaly? From Canada? No its not Celine Dion, but Wedginator Devilution, a powerful front hinged flipper capable of flipping 600kg without any trouble at all. Its got the power in the motors too, 2 x LEM200€™s meaning it can easily out-push even the toughest of machines in this heat. However, 1cm of ground clearance at the back and with limited CO2 on board, could Wedginator Devilution end up getting wedgied by its opponents?
From Gainsborough, MASAMUNE!
A weird robot, this one - barrel shaped, lifting sword weaponry? Where are the super flippers and mega spinners? Masamune is here to prove a point, and what a point it is, in the shape of a Titanium lifting sword, capable enough to get underneath spinners and wedges of any description. However, with 3cm of ground clearance on the sides and rear, will Masamune be a barrel of laughs in this competition?
From Geddington, BALDUR GAMMA!
Basically a heavily armoured tank, Baldur Gamma is doing it for the rammers! Hardox and Titanium on the front scoop means it is literally incapable of getting damaged, and with a potential 18HP of drive, this is certainly no pushover. A front lifting scoop is the key to this robot, but with no damaging weaponry could Baldur Gamma end up as nothing but a glorified pooper-scooper?
From Kelvedon, * 69!
My vote for the weirdest shaped machine in the whole competition - a five pointed spinning death star! This ring spinner can pack a punch, with a total of 15 sharpened teeth mounted on it to damage and terrorize the other machines. Well armoured and with six-wheel-drive it can use its pushing ability as well. However, will a lack of control cause *69 to end up in our very own Black Hole - the Pit of Oblivion!
Roboteers, Stand By!
Your house robots for this magnificent melee are the pain-inducing Panda that is Panda-Mick and the blood-curdling Scotbot, Scream!
Booth One: The zany looking crew from Team Zlayerz, captained by the even zanier looking Kody Kunz, and Alex Holt et crew from Team Doomforall.
Booth Two: Frank Goacher and his disciples from Team Bored, with a gaggle of Jenny Frosts representing Team Slag, captained by Captain Slag himself, Martyn Forsyth.
3€¦2€¦1€¦ACTIVATE!
The word Activate had barely left the lips of the announcer before *69 had started spinning, the sharpened blades on each of the five points merging into one as the LEM200 Lynch Motor picks up speed, dust and debris on the arena floor being blown away in the process. The first impact, however, happens away from the yellow star-shaped blur, as Wedginator Devilution slides underneath Franks barrel-shaped Masamune, flipping it over and allowing the roll-over design to do exactly what it says on the tin. Wedginator Devilution and its driver, Kody Kunz, relentless as ever, continue piling on the pressure, getting underneath it again, but this time instead of flipping it, drives straight underneath it, Masamune crashing over the top of the Canadian Cyborg and onto the steel floor. Baldur Gamma - who to be perfectly honest has not remained stock still this entire time - drives up towards the pit release button, being extra cautious when going near Screams CPZ, the House Robot desperate to get his evil clutches on some robot-fodder! The siren wails as the pit begins to descend, its clear that Baldur Gamma wants this fight over and done with pretty quickly. *69 moves perilously towards Wedginator Devilution and Masamune, an eerie howling sound coming from the spinning body, the blades getting ever so close towards contact, only a metre away...a few centimetres...a couple of millimetres...
*CRASSSSH!* The blades finally make contact, striking Masamunes front wedge and sending both robots spiralling away from each other, Wedginator Devilution left standing there like the child no-one wanted to play with in the playground. But not for long, as Baldur Gamma comes smashing into the front of Wedginator Devilution, the front scoop managing to sneak underneath the wedge and lift it off the ground. A squeal comes from both robots, as they both try desperately to outpush the other. The victor in this little war of attrition is Baldur Gamma, as Wedginator Devilution is slammed into the arena wall, one of the side skirts ripped clean off by a glancing blow caused by the arena flywheels. Masamune, seemingly undeterred by *69s earlier attack, goes in on the charge against the bot from Kelvedon, who has once again gotten up to its full spinning speed, but it dangerously close to the open pit! Martyn pushes the controls on the remote forward, and *69 leaps into action, the six-wheel-drive and tremendous acceleration sending it away from any immediate danger and, once again, into the wedge of Masamune. The sound of metal scraping against metal fills the arena, audience members quickly covering their ears, as Masamune holds its ground, determined not to be beaten into submission, the Hardox wedge scratched but not damaged severely€¦ yet.
Baldur Gamma tries to lift Wedginator up and over the arena wall, but the machine from Canada clings on desperately, as Baldur€™s scoop reaches it maximum height. A quick fire from the flipper of Wedginator Devilution frees itself from Baldur€™s grasp and allows Kody Kunz to drive away from danger...and straight into the path of *69, spinning madly in the centre of the arena. One of the front barbs of Wedginator Devilution is ripped away and flung to one side, as Masamune manages to get underneath the slowed-down ring spinner. The sword lifts up, the machine representing Team Slag now plucked into mid-air and unable to get away. Masamune carefully drives towards the pit, as Baldur Gamma - desperate to get in on the action, crashes into the side of Masamune and dislodging *69 from the lifter, but not entirely, one of the points on the star catching itself on the raised sword. Wedginator slides underneath the back of Baldur Gamma, drives it up the front wedge and flips it over, allowing Masamune and its driver, Frank, to edge *69 closer and closer to the pit. Martyn tries frantically to get the ring spinner moving, but to no avail. *69, now perched on the lip of the pit, has its last moment left in the competition, before *POOOOF!* a cloud of smoke engulfs the only star-shaped robot in the competition.
Now down to only 3 robots left, Baldur Gamma, Wedginator Devilution and Masamune all collide near Screams CPZ, the house robot hungry for some robot-blood! Masamune tries to get the now lowered sword underneath one of its opponents. However it is the front wedge of Wedginator Devilution that succeeds in getting underneath Masamune, flipping it over and testing the roll-over srimech design. Masamune, as designed, rolls over back onto its wheels. However it has rolled over into Screams CPZ, and the house robot goes berserk! Scream slams into the side of Masamune, forcing the barrel-shaped machine onto the front wedge, and continues driving it half way across the arena using the C40-500 Magmotors to the best of their ability. The flipper fires: a high pitched scream from the eponymously named House Robot fills the arena, as Masamune goes soaring into the air. Masamune comes crashing down towards the arena floor, slamming onto its back near the arena side wall. The design, consistent as ever, rolls Masamune back over onto its wheels, just as Baldur Gamma slams into the side of Wedgeinator Devilution and hurtles towards the open pit. Masamune remains frozen on the spot, the internals shaken furiously by the impact after that enormous flip. Refbot begins to count Masamune out, but the audience are watching the action near the pit - Wedginator Devilution has narrowly avoided being shoved into the pit by Baldur Gamma, as Alex Holts machine carries on badgering and aiming to shove Wedginator down into the pit.
1...2...3...
Wedginator tries desperately to get off the front scoop of Baldur, who is completely dominating it, shoving it around the arena floor trying desperately to get the Canadian machine into that pit!
4...5...
The audience gasp once more as Wedginator Devilution, by avoiding the pit for a second time almost manages to get Baldur Gamma to drive in, the back left wheel on the lip of the open pit, still holding the yellow, starry remains of *69.
6...7...8...
Baldur finally has Wedginator lined up for the pit, as it accelerates madly, the pit drawing nearer and nearer, spelling Wedginators doom...
...9...
The crowd whoop and cheer, drumming on the Plexiglass safety screens as if they were drumming a tribal war-chant, as Wedginator Devilution is eventually shoved into the pit, joining fellow loser (sorry, couldnt think of a better word!) *69. Refbots clock flicks to 10, but its too late to safe the machine from Canada, Kody Kunz facing the long drive home!
CEASE!
Weve been waiting for a star to fall...into our Pit of Doom, and Wedginator Devilution shows us that every split second counts in the FVAL arena.
Masamune and Baldur Gamma go through to Round Two!
Round Two looks a little bit like this:
Baldur Gamma VS The Quaestor III
Masamune VS Leprosy Infection
OK, a mini bump of sorts, but I was sorting my computer out and found Round One: Heat D of this!
HEAT D: MELEE ONE
Leprosy Infection vs. The Quaestor III vs. Turbo Tails vs. Apocalypse
From Suffolk, LEPROSY INFECTION!
Is here to infect YOU with a lethal vertical spinning drum capable of reaching 4000RPM, powered by the same motors Robot Wars runner up Storm II used for drive, wowsers! Capable of a top speed of 18mph this infection can spread like wildfire, but with exposed wheels and vulnerable axes, will the other machines be the antidote for Leprosy Infection?
From Pontefract, THE QUAESTOR III!
From ancient Rome, The Quaestor has come to fight for vengeance! Armed with a deadly pneumatic axe and a front lifting wedge, this robot is well weaponed. The armour isnt shabby either: a mixture of Hardox, Aluminium and Steel giving this machine good overall protection. A potential top speed of 25mph makes The Quaestor the fastest in the melee, but could that top speed leave The Quaestor ROMAN around the arena and out of control?
From Glasgow, TURBO TAILS!
Awww, how cute its a little fox, but dont let looks deceive you in the arena - this fox isn€™t as cuddly as it looks! Low, sleek, agile, well armoured, this looks a good robot. A front flipper and rear spinning blade gives this fox plenty of bite, the body protected with Hardox and... FUR? Hmmm, flambed fox, anyone?
From Cardiff, APOCALYPSE!
Watch out, boyo, the end of the world is approaching... in the form of Apocalypse! A low fearsome flipping machine, capable of tossing machines roughly 8ft into the air, and hopefully out of the arena! Strong armouring and 6 wheel drive means this robot can certainly make its force known in the arena, but with limited CO2 on board could it be Apocalypse N-Owww!!
Roboteers, Stand By!
The house robots this evening - he may be endangered, but he€™s here to prove that not all panda€™s are cuddly, it€™s Panda-Mick! And joining him tonight is the one and only, the most Psycho-est Psycho in Psycholand€¦ it€™s Mr Psycho!
Booth One: Joey McConnell and the rest of Team Chevron, and Steve McGregor and his little band of minions that represent Team BraveHeart.
Booth Two: Liam Eliot and Team Welsh Warlords, and Team Dino Warriors, captained, as ever, by Christopher Mason.
3€¦2€¦1€¦ACTIVATE!
And the first fight of Heat D gets underway, Leprosy Infection already getting its spinning drum whirring up to its top speed as it darts towards the centre of the arena, smashing head first into the oncoming Turbo Tails. Steve McGregor winces as the drum starts chewing up some of the delicious yellow fur, but Chris Mason, apprehensive about the drum getting clogged, quickly reverses out of the way. The Quaestor III brings its axe into play, *THWACK!*, scoring a hit onto the top of the reversing Leprosy Infection and putting a small dent into the 7mm Titanium armouring. Apocalypse doesnt want to be left out in the cold, and drives straight under the 8mm side ground clearance of Turbo Tails before launching it into the air! *FLIP!* The flying fox doesnt seem to fly for long though, as it comes crashing towards the centre of the arena and bounces off the arena floor, the fur ripped and exposing the Hardox armour underneath. Turbo Tails quickly self rights with the front hinged flipper, and immediately gets on the attack with the spinning blade, attempting to get revenge on Leprosy Infection after its initial onslaught. Apocalypse turns its attention to The Quaestor III, and tries to get the front wedge underneath. However it is the machine from Pontefract that gets the upper hand, its front wedge sliding underneath and allowing the axe to come down, hoping to penetrate the 4mm Hardox front face. *THWACK!* Apocalypses armour withstands the axe blow, but is flipped over quite swiftly by the flipping mechanism embedded in The Quaestors front wedge, exposing the weak Titanium base-plate. The axe comes down again, *THWACK!* this time easily getting through the armour and stopping Apocalypse from self righting efficiently.
Leprosy Infection, meanwhile, has managed to rip a tiny bit of fur off of Turbo Tails, the trophy piece whirling around the drum like a yellow blur, but not slowing the drum down. Chris Mason drives his Leprosy Infection machine forwards again to cause more damage, but Steve McGregor has sensed what was about to happen, and quickly spins Turbo Tails around, bringing the horizontal spinning axes into play. *CLASSSSH!*
The audience wince as both spinners collide, an explosion of sparks flooding the arena, both machines engulfed in a firework of bright white sparks, then flung to the opposite sides of the arena by the sheer force. Leprosy Infection skids into the arena side wall, narrowly avoiding crashing into the spinning flywheels, but the drum appears to have stopped spinning altogether... as has Turbo Tails spinning blade! Both spinning weapons have been disabled after that tremendous clout! Chris looks unphased, as he drives a now weaponless Leprosy Infection towards The Quaestor III and Apocalypse, the latter managing to self right after Refbot gave Joey McConnells machine a little nudge to release the axe! A slam from Leprosy Infection lets Apocalypse know that there are now two robots ganging up on him, the power in the S28-400 MagMotors pushing Apocalypse into the side wall and on the edge of Panda-Micks CPZ! *CRRRUNCH!*
The camera pans up to Steve McGregor, who looks down-trodden and jolly well annoyed - Turbo Tails has remained ever so statuesque since that huge collision with Leprosy Infection. The fur, tattered and torn in places and a small trail of smoke billowing out from the back of Turbo Tails signals that it is out of the melee and out of the competition. Refbot counts out the fox from Glasgow, Mr Psycho impatiently waiting to feed on the carcass.
8...9...10! *BEEEEEEP!*
The timer has barely reached the magic number 10 before Mr Psycho grapples the poor, tragic Turbo Tails, the huge claw buckling the Hardox armour and destroying the chassis. Psycho trundles over to the flame pit, the flames leaping out and setting the yellow fur on Turbo Tails alight, like some cheap firework! The flaming machine, lifted up for the whole audience to see, is helpless as Mr Psycho parades it around the arena before dumping it like a piece of rubbish onto the arena floor flipper. Refbot quickly scoots over, fire extinguisher in hand to douse the flames on Turbo Tails, just as *WHOOOOSH!* the floor flipper fires, sending the fox flying through the air for the second time in this fight, bouncing off the floor and, in a move the British Gymnastics Team would be proud of, over the arena wall, landing on the floor below straight onto its wheels. The audience whoop and holler, as the number of contestants in this opening melee have been reduced by one.
Back in the arena, Apocalypse, still overcoming the slam into the arena wall from Leprosy Infection, comes back on the attack against the machine from Suffolk, sliding underneath the ground clearance and the static drum at the front and flipping it into the air! Leprosy comes back down to earth with a bang, smashing into the steel floor, the Titanium armouring looking buckled and crumbled on collision. Joey looks to get this battle over and done with, as he drives The Quaestor III towards the pit release button, carefully avoiding Mr Psycho in the process. Bits of flamey fur litter the arena floor as Leprosy Infection, tenacious as ever, slams into Apocalypse once again, this time managing to avoid the front wedge and crash into the side, pushing its prey towards the arena flywheels mounted on the side walls! A humungous CRASSSSH! deafens the whole arena, as the force of the slam not only disables the flywheel, but sends the Hardox side panel of Apocalypse careering into the centre of the arena! *CLANG!*
The innards of Apocalypse are exposed, just as the siren wails, announcing to all that the pit is descending. Chris valiantly keeps the pressure on, as Apocalypse, unable to get the flipper into play, is helpless! The Quaestor rushes down the arena, trying to get in on the action, and does so with another huge *THWACK!* with the axe on Leprosy Infection, the armouring really taking a battering here today! Liam, flustered and desperate to get away from the side wall, fires the flipper, the front of the machine raising off the ground and allowing Leprosy Infection to get underneath the Cardiff-based-bot every so slightly. The Quaestor also manages to get under, and fires its lifting device. Apocalypse is sent over onto its back, but not for long, as Liam immediately self rights in style, a clean 360 degree flip back onto its wheels, but sadly directly back onto the wedge of The Quaestor. The axe comes down, not damaging the Hardox armour but holding its prey tightly, as it heads towards the pit. Chris Mason backs off, completely aware of what Joey is aiming to do. Liam fires the flipper again, hoping to free itself from The Quaestors clutches, but to no avail, as Joey quickly brakes before reaching the pit. *POOOOOOF!* Apocalypse slowly slides off the front wedge and directly into oblivion, submerged in a cloud of thick white smoke!
CEASE!!
Steve goes home with his Turbo Tails between his legs, and Apocalypse failed to bring impending doom to this arena!
Leprosy Infection and The Quaestor III go through to Round Two!
HEAT D: MELEE TWO
Wedginator Devilution vs. Masamune vs. Baldur Gamma vs. *69
From Toronto, WEDGINATOR DEVILUTION!
Green and scaly? From Canada? No its not Celine Dion, but Wedginator Devilution, a powerful front hinged flipper capable of flipping 600kg without any trouble at all. Its got the power in the motors too, 2 x LEM200€™s meaning it can easily out-push even the toughest of machines in this heat. However, 1cm of ground clearance at the back and with limited CO2 on board, could Wedginator Devilution end up getting wedgied by its opponents?
From Gainsborough, MASAMUNE!
A weird robot, this one - barrel shaped, lifting sword weaponry? Where are the super flippers and mega spinners? Masamune is here to prove a point, and what a point it is, in the shape of a Titanium lifting sword, capable enough to get underneath spinners and wedges of any description. However, with 3cm of ground clearance on the sides and rear, will Masamune be a barrel of laughs in this competition?
From Geddington, BALDUR GAMMA!
Basically a heavily armoured tank, Baldur Gamma is doing it for the rammers! Hardox and Titanium on the front scoop means it is literally incapable of getting damaged, and with a potential 18HP of drive, this is certainly no pushover. A front lifting scoop is the key to this robot, but with no damaging weaponry could Baldur Gamma end up as nothing but a glorified pooper-scooper?
From Kelvedon, * 69!
My vote for the weirdest shaped machine in the whole competition - a five pointed spinning death star! This ring spinner can pack a punch, with a total of 15 sharpened teeth mounted on it to damage and terrorize the other machines. Well armoured and with six-wheel-drive it can use its pushing ability as well. However, will a lack of control cause *69 to end up in our very own Black Hole - the Pit of Oblivion!
Roboteers, Stand By!
Your house robots for this magnificent melee are the pain-inducing Panda that is Panda-Mick and the blood-curdling Scotbot, Scream!
Booth One: The zany looking crew from Team Zlayerz, captained by the even zanier looking Kody Kunz, and Alex Holt et crew from Team Doomforall.
Booth Two: Frank Goacher and his disciples from Team Bored, with a gaggle of Jenny Frosts representing Team Slag, captained by Captain Slag himself, Martyn Forsyth.
3€¦2€¦1€¦ACTIVATE!
The word Activate had barely left the lips of the announcer before *69 had started spinning, the sharpened blades on each of the five points merging into one as the LEM200 Lynch Motor picks up speed, dust and debris on the arena floor being blown away in the process. The first impact, however, happens away from the yellow star-shaped blur, as Wedginator Devilution slides underneath Franks barrel-shaped Masamune, flipping it over and allowing the roll-over design to do exactly what it says on the tin. Wedginator Devilution and its driver, Kody Kunz, relentless as ever, continue piling on the pressure, getting underneath it again, but this time instead of flipping it, drives straight underneath it, Masamune crashing over the top of the Canadian Cyborg and onto the steel floor. Baldur Gamma - who to be perfectly honest has not remained stock still this entire time - drives up towards the pit release button, being extra cautious when going near Screams CPZ, the House Robot desperate to get his evil clutches on some robot-fodder! The siren wails as the pit begins to descend, its clear that Baldur Gamma wants this fight over and done with pretty quickly. *69 moves perilously towards Wedginator Devilution and Masamune, an eerie howling sound coming from the spinning body, the blades getting ever so close towards contact, only a metre away...a few centimetres...a couple of millimetres...
*CRASSSSH!* The blades finally make contact, striking Masamunes front wedge and sending both robots spiralling away from each other, Wedginator Devilution left standing there like the child no-one wanted to play with in the playground. But not for long, as Baldur Gamma comes smashing into the front of Wedginator Devilution, the front scoop managing to sneak underneath the wedge and lift it off the ground. A squeal comes from both robots, as they both try desperately to outpush the other. The victor in this little war of attrition is Baldur Gamma, as Wedginator Devilution is slammed into the arena wall, one of the side skirts ripped clean off by a glancing blow caused by the arena flywheels. Masamune, seemingly undeterred by *69s earlier attack, goes in on the charge against the bot from Kelvedon, who has once again gotten up to its full spinning speed, but it dangerously close to the open pit! Martyn pushes the controls on the remote forward, and *69 leaps into action, the six-wheel-drive and tremendous acceleration sending it away from any immediate danger and, once again, into the wedge of Masamune. The sound of metal scraping against metal fills the arena, audience members quickly covering their ears, as Masamune holds its ground, determined not to be beaten into submission, the Hardox wedge scratched but not damaged severely€¦ yet.
Baldur Gamma tries to lift Wedginator up and over the arena wall, but the machine from Canada clings on desperately, as Baldur€™s scoop reaches it maximum height. A quick fire from the flipper of Wedginator Devilution frees itself from Baldur€™s grasp and allows Kody Kunz to drive away from danger...and straight into the path of *69, spinning madly in the centre of the arena. One of the front barbs of Wedginator Devilution is ripped away and flung to one side, as Masamune manages to get underneath the slowed-down ring spinner. The sword lifts up, the machine representing Team Slag now plucked into mid-air and unable to get away. Masamune carefully drives towards the pit, as Baldur Gamma - desperate to get in on the action, crashes into the side of Masamune and dislodging *69 from the lifter, but not entirely, one of the points on the star catching itself on the raised sword. Wedginator slides underneath the back of Baldur Gamma, drives it up the front wedge and flips it over, allowing Masamune and its driver, Frank, to edge *69 closer and closer to the pit. Martyn tries frantically to get the ring spinner moving, but to no avail. *69, now perched on the lip of the pit, has its last moment left in the competition, before *POOOOF!* a cloud of smoke engulfs the only star-shaped robot in the competition.
Now down to only 3 robots left, Baldur Gamma, Wedginator Devilution and Masamune all collide near Screams CPZ, the house robot hungry for some robot-blood! Masamune tries to get the now lowered sword underneath one of its opponents. However it is the front wedge of Wedginator Devilution that succeeds in getting underneath Masamune, flipping it over and testing the roll-over srimech design. Masamune, as designed, rolls over back onto its wheels. However it has rolled over into Screams CPZ, and the house robot goes berserk! Scream slams into the side of Masamune, forcing the barrel-shaped machine onto the front wedge, and continues driving it half way across the arena using the C40-500 Magmotors to the best of their ability. The flipper fires: a high pitched scream from the eponymously named House Robot fills the arena, as Masamune goes soaring into the air. Masamune comes crashing down towards the arena floor, slamming onto its back near the arena side wall. The design, consistent as ever, rolls Masamune back over onto its wheels, just as Baldur Gamma slams into the side of Wedgeinator Devilution and hurtles towards the open pit. Masamune remains frozen on the spot, the internals shaken furiously by the impact after that enormous flip. Refbot begins to count Masamune out, but the audience are watching the action near the pit - Wedginator Devilution has narrowly avoided being shoved into the pit by Baldur Gamma, as Alex Holts machine carries on badgering and aiming to shove Wedginator down into the pit.
1...2...3...
Wedginator tries desperately to get off the front scoop of Baldur, who is completely dominating it, shoving it around the arena floor trying desperately to get the Canadian machine into that pit!
4...5...
The audience gasp once more as Wedginator Devilution, by avoiding the pit for a second time almost manages to get Baldur Gamma to drive in, the back left wheel on the lip of the open pit, still holding the yellow, starry remains of *69.
6...7...8...
Baldur finally has Wedginator lined up for the pit, as it accelerates madly, the pit drawing nearer and nearer, spelling Wedginators doom...
...9...
The crowd whoop and cheer, drumming on the Plexiglass safety screens as if they were drumming a tribal war-chant, as Wedginator Devilution is eventually shoved into the pit, joining fellow loser (sorry, couldnt think of a better word!) *69. Refbots clock flicks to 10, but its too late to safe the machine from Canada, Kody Kunz facing the long drive home!
CEASE!
Weve been waiting for a star to fall...into our Pit of Doom, and Wedginator Devilution shows us that every split second counts in the FVAL arena.
Masamune and Baldur Gamma go through to Round Two!
Round Two looks a little bit like this:
Baldur Gamma VS The Quaestor III
Masamune VS Leprosy Infection
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