NSBFL 7

[razerdave]

NSBFL 7

Hmmm.

I dont like The Moat arena because I can be pushed out or richochet out from a hit, but Ill see if I can lure ABR to the walls when he tries to ram me, or bully hik close enough to knock him out. Or ill just batter the hell out of it.

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

Welcome to another round 2 fight, this time between two seeds! In the heat, fourth seeds The Deer managed to get PRP down the moat in a short fight, but then suffered damage against the dangerous Hefty Kick in the Balls. V€™Ger toppled Circuit Breaker in a very quick fight, but had a somewhat tougher opponent in GeForce, but still managing to immobilise it. We move to the Roulette arena for this fight.

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ACTIVATE!!

V€™Ger has a slow start, backing off to get the spinner running, but Martyn doesn€™t want his machine taking any more damage, and The Deer goes straight for V€™Ger, rounding one of the pits as it does so. This manoeuvring gives Nick time to get away from the box rush, and with the flywheel spinning, goes to attack The Deer! The Deer evades the flywheel however, by nipping the sides of V€™Ger and denting the armour enough so that V€™Ger can€™t push through!

With The Deer gripping onto V€™Ger for all it€™s worth, a pushing match begins. However with both machines using the exact same drive, it stalemates, with both machines edging around in circles as neither can gain any advantage! At one point, V€™Ger is edged over a pit, which doesn€™t open. Still V€™ger is locked in The Deer€™s grip though, and as V€™Ger is still mobile and thus not being pinned, Martyn isn€™t under any obligation to let go.

Still, as both machines are pushing and pulling in opposite directions as the drivers fight for control, neither can be said to actually have any, with The Deer drifting over the pit V€™Ger failed to drop down earlier. Like V€™Ger, The Deer survives and the fight continues, with V€™Ger spinning into the CPZ, and straight onto the flipper of Flipup! The flipper fires, and V€™Ger isn€™t launched into the air so much as suplexed over The Deer, which is also flipped over due to its grip on V€™Ger!

The result is terrible for both machines. V€™Ger is upside down, and unable to self right as The Deer has landed on top of it. The Deer has let go, but can€™t get off V€™Ger, who can€™t self right because of the added weight! Both machines are immobile, and both counted out. We go to an unexpected judges decision.

Control: Bluntly, neither had much as for just about all the fight they were locked together and interfering with each others movement.

Aggression: Both were aggressive at the start, and that€™s pretty much it.

Damage: Neither seemed too affected by the launch from Flipup, and the only real damage that could be found were the dents on V€™Ger from The Deer€™s crusher.

As it is, there€™s not enough of a fight to judge, so the judges have called for the match to be restarted! Both machines are not to be recharged or repaired, and the match is restarted with four minutes left on the clock.

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The Deer starts off in exactly the same way, driving around the pit in front of it and trying to get at V€™Ger before it can get its flywheel spun up. This time instead of reversing away from The Deer, V€™Ger turns and runs past The Deer, who also turns to try and get V€™Ger back in the claws, but instead gets lifted up by the lifter! V€™Ger reverses with The Deer and pushes it over a pit, but there€™s not to be a quick end to this rematch as the pit stays shut!

V€™Ger turns around, causing The Deer to fall off the lifter, and strikes it on the side, causing a large crack in the polycarb and spinning The Deer off the pit! V€™Ger drives around the pit to attack again, but The Deer drives towards it and almost gets it locked in the pinchers! Nick hurriedly reverses V€™Ger to avoid what happened before, going over the pit behind him in his haste, but getting away with it.

The Deer follows V€™Ger, carefully driving around the pit and managing to catch hold of it! Nick groans and another dance begins, with V€™Ger almost immediately drifting over the nearby pit, failing to drop down, followed with The Deer being pulled over the same pit moments later, and the deadlock continues as The Deer is equally as lucky! Then V€™Ger somehow manages to break itself free of The Deer€™s grip, probably because The Deer was gripping at an angle rather than full on this time.

Whatever, V€™Ger is free and repays Martyn by spinning around and connecting on one of the claws with the flywheel, spinning The Deer over the pit, and still the fourth seed lives on as a different pit opens! The Deer quickly turns and rams straight into the flywheel to stop it spinning back up, and the claws start to close, with V€™Ger once more reversing hurriedly away and going into the PPZ, where it has a close encounter with Uncle Tomahawk and nearly gets hit by the axe before driving back out of the PPZ, only to be rammed straight back in by The Deer!

Once more, V€™Ger escapes the PPZ after suffering no house robot attacks, But The Deer keeps on the pressure, trying to get the claws around V€™Ger, and almost managing, giving V€™Ger a nasty scratch it the armour as V€™Ger gets free just in the Nick of time Unfortunately, Nick is more concerned with avoiding a repeat of the dreaded deadlock than where V€™Ger is going, and it goes straight over a pit, and not straight down it!

The Deer turns and gives chases, but Martyn doesn€™t want to push his luck by going over the pit, and so goes around it instead, once more being caught on the rear lifter and being propped up and being pushed backwards over the pit anyway! Like last time however, it€™s another pit that opens momentarily, and The Deer is again dropped off the lifter by V€™Ger turning around to attack with the flywheel in a repeat of the last exchange of attacks!

Time is ticking down now, and The Deer gets its claws back around V€™Ger, but once more V€™Ger manages to escape with not much more than a scratch down its armour thanks to the angle, but spins straight into the PPZ again, and worse straight into the flywheel of The Militant, which bounces it flywheel first into the arena wall! Part of the wall is smashed off, but not enough to justify stopping the fight again, and as V€™Ger reverses out of the PPZ, The Deer catches it and tries to keep it in the PPZ!

The fight looks deadlocked again to the casual observer, but The Deer has just managed to catch one of V€™Gers partially exposed wheels! The claw has gone through the wheel, stopping it turning and thus giving The Deer an edge in the pushing battle for the first time in the fight! The Deer tries to line V€™Ger up over a pit, but V€™Ger still has the other wheel running and so Nick manages to spin V€™Ger away from its course, almost spinning The Deer over the pit!

Nick has some dictation over where the locked robots go, but Martyn has more control in this exchange, and so V€™Ger ends up in the PPZ once more, being pushed right under the axe of Uncle Tomahawk! The Deer reverses out of the PPZ, and V€™Ger, hobbling somewhat, beats a hasty retreat! Uncle Tomahawk tries to block V€™Ger in, but is lifted up by V€™Ger causing it to fall out of the way! The Deer comes in as time is running down and just avoids getting lifted up again! Still, V€™Ger is able to get out of the claws in time, and CEASE is called!

Well, a frustrating time for both combatants, neither controlling the match as they would have liked. We head into what is possibly the first ever second judges decision for one fight.

Aggression: The Deer did most of the chasing, with V€™Ger mostly getting in defensive attacks. The Deer: 3. V€™Ger: 2

Damage: The Deer took some flywheel blows, and has two large cracks and a small piece of armour missing, plus a dent in a claw. V€™Ger has some dents and scratches from the claws, and a somewhat larger dent from The Militant. Uncle Tomahawk€™s blows couldn€™t be found. More tellingly, it has a damaged wheel. The Deer looks more beat up, but as it caused a little damage to V€™Gers manoeuvrability, making this area closer than it otherwise might have been. The Deer: 2. V€™Ger: 3.

Control: The Deer just about has an edge here. Not taking the deadlocked areas into account, V€™Ger was occasionally driving itself over pits or into the PPZ, albeit to escape another deadlock. Therefore, The Deer had better control. The Deer: 3. V€™Ger: 2.

Final result: The Deer: 8. V€™Ger: 7.

I think this deposes Hell Machine vs Star 69 as hardest fight to judge. V€™Ger dared to be the 13th seed in an arena that involves luck, and look what happened The Deer moves through to the quarter finals!

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

It€™s time for the last round 2 match up! In the heat, Flaming Hell had a rough match against ForcePower Turbo, eventually winning on battery life alone. In the heat final, it suffered a scare against Kruel Intent, as both machines vanished into the pit. The judges ruled Flaming Hell through on damage. Annoying Box Rush took out the second seed Wedge Devo in a rough and tumble match, never allowing the seed to get into things at all. It then had a somewhat easier fight against You Only Live Once, which lost a tooth, and then the fight. Annoying Box Rush has kept its anti spinner lead plate for this fight, and we move into The Moat.

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It€™s an acceleration battle! ABR rushes straight at Flaming Hell to stall it, while Flaming Hell spins up the cage! Dave takes Flaming hell away from the charge to give himself an edge, and it works as ABR misses Flaming Hell, giving the cage spinner time to spin up in peace! ABR spins around and charges Flaming Hell€™s side though, smashing into the deadly spinning vortex and getting knocked away and nearly down the moat!

Flaming Hell€™s teeth seem to be made of sterner stuff than YOLO€™s though, and it against starts spinning up, before ABR turns around and plows into it again! Once more, ABR is knocked away, but not so much as the cage wasn€™t as fast spinning this time. Again, ABR crashes into the cage in an effort to stall Flaming Hell, and again is knocked away, but only a little this time, and ABR is finally able to get under the stalled Flaming hell before it can get away and lift it up and over!

Nick backs ABR off to see if Flaming Hell€™s srimech works, as he doesn€™t want to knock it back over and into the fight if it turns out it could get counted out here. The prongs on Flaming Hell open up, pushing Flaming Hell up and€¦ Not quite over! The cage starts spinning though, and bounces Flaming Hell up and onto its wheels, but before it can spin up again or get away, ABR charges in, stalling the spinner, and it€™s become clear Flaming Hell can self right after a fashion, dumps Flaming Hell straight down the moat.

Flaming hell, extinguished. ABR absolutely breaks robots!

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

And now, the lightweight draw! Remember, three way melees, and one machine goes on.

Miss Dee Meaner vs Lithium vs Little big Bot - The Moat
Jo Mamma vs Ringo Scarr vs Manic Aggressive - Last bot standing
Hell Hound vs Trisadekaphobia vs RQRCL - Classic
Crash vs Mad Cows Revenge vs Gridlock - Classic

And to stop people asking, the quarter final draw. Arenas will be drawn at the time.

Sonic Boom vs MORD
Annoying Box Rush vs Star 69
Wedga Revo vs Seggy the 3rd(6)
The Deer(4) vs Going Crunch(12)

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

We€™re between rounds again. That means more melees! Last time around we had the mighty middleweights, now let€™s have the lethal lightweights. Fighting in the Moat for that first place in the final will be:

Miss Dee Meaner is a lightweight all the way from the U.S of A, so Dave will be rooting for it. It€™s a Hazard style spinner, but the bar is bent towards the ground so pesky flipper can€™t get near. Will the American spin to win, or will a lack of self righting turn their hopes upside down?

Little Big Bot comes from the same camp as Tom, who€™s already booked a place in its final, so maybe Chris is confident of his chances? Little Big Bot had to make a couple of changes before being allowed entry and only just squeezed in thanks to its heavyweight drive. Still, the axe is also heavyweight and not to be sneezed at.

Lithium is quite an odd €˜bot. It€™s a Scott €˜bot that, get this, was entered in good time The shape is described as €œBacklash on acid€, which kinda makes me think Scott designed this at the same time he painted Glasgow Kiss€¦ Anyway, it€™s got thick polycarb for armour and a painful looking flywheel, so it could go far. However, exposed wheels mean other spinners could leave Lithium uh€¦ I€™ll throw in a pun later.

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Little is off to the fastest start, charging at Lithium and attacking with the axe! Lithium is no slouch either though, and twists away from the flailing axe while getting the flywheel spun up! All this is fine by the American team, as they stay well away from the action and get the bar ominously spun up! Little is still attacking Lithium, but not having much luck in landing a blow. Lithium, however, is all spun up and ready to counter-attack!

The disc of Lithium glances the side of Little as Lithium turns around, and a sharp crack rings out across the arena! Little seems unharmed, but Lithium turns around more and the flywheel bites into the side of Little, bouncing it up and a piece flies off of Little€™s armour! Instead of pressing the attack though, Lithium hurries off. Scott has just checked to see where Miss is, and has just seen it coming up behind his own robot!

Miss ignores the fleeing Lithium however, and strikes Little, further damaging the side! Little is still alive and kicking though, and starts kicking, slamming the axe down on Miss€™ top, with the bar resting against Little€™s side, and now quite helpless! Lithium comes back into the fray, aiding Little and bites into the side of Miss, putting an evil slice into the armour! Miss reverses away from the team up and starts to spin up again, but Lithium slams in before Miss can get away, taking a scratch from the bar, but adding a somewhat larger one into the front of Miss!

Lithium pushes forward, and the flywheel penetrates Miss€™ armour, creating a huge tear in the front of Miss! Little prowls around the arena, obviously awaiting the winner of Lithium and Miss Dee Meaner. It looks like the smart money is going on Lithium, as once more Miss fails to escape and gets another huge gash courtesy of Lithium!

Now Lithium attacks the bar itself as Miss tries to get away, and buckles the metal, slicing into the weapon on Miss! Like one of those horrible little dogs that just won€™t let go of your ankle once it€™s gotten its teeth in, Lithium isn€™t going away, no matter how much Miss€™ driver tries to shake it off, and instead bumps into Little, who once again starts attacking the top of Miss! Things are looking bad for Miss, as the axe hits the body, putting fearsome gashes and dents into it, and strikes the bar once or twice as well, further bending it out of shape. Will it work even if they get away?

Scott doesn€™t think it will, as he finally leaves Miss alone and slams into Little! Chris is taken by surprise, and a large crack appears in his robots armour Little recovers quickly, turning around to attack Lithium, and the axe smashes onto the back of Lithium, not seeming to do much damage as Lithium drives forwards and slams the disc into the front of Little! Now Miss comes in and rams hard into the back of Lithium, but it seems the bar isn€™t working after the battering, turning Miss into a rather ineffective ram €˜bot.

Lithium ignores it as best he can, and concentrates on dodging around and attacking Little! Little axes the top of Miss once to show it who€™s boss, and then takes off after Lithium and attacks the space where it had been a second ago. Or more accurately, attacks the floor. Lithium attacks the front of Little again, tearing a large piece of armour away! Miss slams into the side of Little, and you€™ve got to admire them for still attacking after the punishment their machine€™s taken!

Little manages to hit Lithium with the axe again, but the blow slides off and Lithium once more attacks the front of Little! This blow is the last straw, and the front panel shatters, exposing the very innards of Little! Chris hurriedly reverses his machine away from Lithium, just managing to keep his internal workings from being liquidated, blended together, and served up as a rather fine smoothie. Where was I? The fight? Sorry.

Lithium gives chase on Little, but Miss comes in and rams Lithium hard in the side, knocking it sideways and towards the moat! It looks like we might be in for an almighty shock here, as Lithium has been the most dominant robot in the match, and it looks to be pushed into the moat by a damaged and weapon-less Miss! But it€™s not to be! Lithium spins out of the way, clipping Miss€™ corner as it does so and bending the armour up in a short spray of sparks!

Little wants to get in on the action now, and comes at Lithium and Miss! However, Chris is driving Little in reverse, keeping the armour-less front side well away from the other two machines! Scott reverses away from Miss, leaving it alone. He wants to attack the front side of Little, and so he drives by the side, hoping to spin around and plunge the flywheel into Little€™s internals! Chris isn€™t having any of that though, and spins Little around while reversing, taking a little clip from the flywheel, but not seeming to take much damage! Miss comes in and rams the side of Little, as CEASE is called! We€™re off to the judges, folks!

Control: All robots seemed very well controlled, and Chris did very well in keeping the most damaged sections away from Lithium€™s disc. Miss did less well, taking a lot of damage from the other two machines. Lithium: 2. Little Big Bot: 2. Miss Dee Meaner: 1.

Aggression: Lithium was by far the most aggressive, causing a lot of damage to both opponents. Miss Dee Meaner, despite taking a lot of punishment and losing its weapon early on, still kept attacking when it seemed hopeless and almost got rid of Lithium. Little Big Bot attacked as well, but seemed to join in on the action rather than starting it. Lithium: 2. Little Big Bot: 1. Miss Dee Meaner: 2.

Damage: Lithium caused hideous amounts of damage to both opponents. Little Big Bot did damage to Miss Dee Meaner, but only hit Lithium twice. Miss Dee Meaner did a little damage on Little, and a tiny bit on Lithium in the early goings. Lithium: 3. Little Big Bot: 1. Miss Dee Meaner: 1.

Final result: Lithium: 7. Little Big Bot: 4. Miss Dee Meaner: 4.

Little Big Bot, cut down to size! Miss Dee Meaner needs to be meaner. Lithium€¦ Ah, screw it. I still can€™t think of a Lithium pun. It goes through.

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

Another day, another lashing of lightweights. This time we move into the Last €˜Bot Standing arena to see who€™s the baddest bruiser in the business.

Ringo Scarr, formerly of the Bottles, is currently pursuing a solo career, and yes I know I did this joke for Tom, I don€™t care. Shut up. When he€™s not voicing trains, Ringo likes to hang out in the arena and use his drum to damage more than eardums, it can damage robots too. Skirted and invertible, could Ringo have what it takes to reach number one? Not if someone can exploit his weak armour.

Jo Mamma had better have more than an insult or three lined up if they hope to do well. Unfortunately for all, it looks like it may do. An overhead spinning bar does the damage, and the front wedge gets them up there. If this robot was called €œPub Landlord€ I could make such a good €œyou€™re barred€ joke. Bugger:sad:

Finally, Manic Aggressive has put down the valium, and picked up a chainsaw for some serious stress relief. OK, a saw blade, but whatever. This could do well, as it has a compact shape and could add a slice or two to any challenger. However, if someone can get past the wheels guards they could do what Razer did to Milly-Ann-Bot.

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And Ringo Scarr€™s off and heading straight at Jo Mamma, with the drum spinning up as it travels! Manic follows at a more sedate pace, and Jo Mamma turns the wedge to face Ringo! Ringo shoots up the wedge, and gets knocked off by the bar, which at this point is travelling slowly. Ringo rests on its side for a moment before thumping back down onto its back.

Manic joins the action now, biting into the rear of Ringo with its saw blade, but not doing much damage before Ringo takes off, spins around and rams into the side of Manic! The drum bites into the wheel guard, buckling it upwards and breaking the bolts on one end! Manic reverses away from Ringo, but makes the mistake of Jo Mamma, and takes a slice in the side from the bar, completely tearing off the wheel guard and damaging the wheel underneath!

Manic, being a four wheeled robot, can still move, but has lost some mobility, and Ringo slams into the already damaged side and tears off the other wheel, leaving the dangerous looking Manic limping in circles! Ringo has no time for victory though, as Jo Mamma attacks Ringo from behind, tearing a gash in the armour and knocking Ringo into a spin! Ringo turns and charges Jo Mamma, hoping to get in before the blade is spun up, but it€™s not to be as the blade catches Ringo and knocks it into another spin.

Ringo is stopped in its tracks, but Manic is still limping around so Jo Mamma goes to attack it again while Ringo is counted out! Manic tries to spin around to bring the saw into play, but takes the attack from Jo Mamma, further damaging the wheel-less side! Manic is still moving, but the driver sees no hope for this fight. The controller is turned off and put down as Jo Mamma attacks again, and Manic is also counted out.

Ringo Scarr dropped out the charts, Manic Aggressive back on the valium. Jo Mamma€™s such a slapper, it knocks other robots around!

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

The other two melees will either be later in the week or next weekend.

[steven_mcg]

NSBFL 7

Excellent fights as ever, Franky.

Just a shame the actual results arent quite up to par.

[Guest]

NSBFL 7

[Ringo Scarr, formerly of the Bottles, is currently pursuing a solo career, and yes I know I did this joke for Tom, I don€™t care. Shut up.]

Har har har.

[mrdaves]

NSBFL 7

*Throws a Jersey potato at Frank*

good fights mr G.

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

Owch

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

Oh yeah, I just worked out what Toms on about. I wasnt talking about you there :P

[Guest]

NSBFL 7

Its actually a suspiciously accurate joke. You sure? *raises eyebrow*

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

It was made about Chris Ms middleweight, also called Tom.

...Ehh, I guess both work

[Guest]

NSBFL 7

Yeah, I know, but the jokes surprisingly efficient.