NSBFL 7

[darkguru]

NSBFL 7

Woot, the surprise package and a guranteed top four seed to boot Oh, and nice fight

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

It€™s getting near to the point where we€™ll be crowning this yeas champion. Champions in fact, seeing we have other weights this year. Before we can have an absolute glut of finals, however, we still need to work out the final players in the heavyweight game. For out first fight, we go into the Moat.

Chris will be looking for revenge here, as MORD€™s first fight was against his own 360. That didn€™t prove too much of a challenge, but the next was the former champ slayer, Die-Ceratops Invertus. Slayer was slain, and MORD went through to face Manic Monsoon. Despite taking a huge battering, it was the mighty rammer who fell€¦ Literally. Down the pit it went. Speaking of slaying the slayers, it was next against Sonic Boom, who€™s just won our fifth place melee. Once more, the pit was MORD€™s best friend.

Going Crunch has always gotten through the first round, and this year was no exception as it got past PTT 1 winner Beta, then doubled its record by taking out Panicking. Stratos-Fear had looked unbeatable in its heat, but also fell to the cluster €˜bot by falling in the moat. It looked set for an easy, yet eventual victory over The Deer as it was too low for the crusher to grip! However eventually turned into quickly due to a combination of positioning and a broken flipper. That sounds really confusing. Just go read the fight if you forgot.

3€¦
2€¦
1€¦..
ACTIVATE!!

Well Richard€™s terrorised enough people with Double Killa, now he€™s about to learn what it€™s like to fight a cluster €˜bot, as Going Crunch split up and get away from each other as MORD comes in, turning as it does so to keep in line with Crunch, which is the part Richard is aiming for! Crunch tries to escape the scoop, but MORD plows into it! Crunch is spun around slightly, the flywheel hitting the scoop and bouncing Crunch off in a shower of sparks! MORD turns though, catching the side of Crunch and turning it over as Going comes in to make the save by flipping MORD from the side!

MORD turns to attack Going as Crunch self rights, but neither gets in a good place to attack and start jockeying for position, ending up side to side. MORD then manages to drive behind Going, but instead of capitalising, goes after Crunch again! Crunch€™s spinner is deflected by the scoop, and once more Crunch finds itself overturned as Going spins around to attack the side of MORD! But MORD drives forwards, pushing the self righting Crunch towards the moat, and Going misses! MORD has almost got Crunch into the moat when Going spins around again to attack, and MORD backs away from its attack on Crunch in fear of being flipped into the moat!

Instead, MORD raises the scoop and goes after Going with the flywheel! Going backs away as Crunch self rights, and almost drives itself into the moat as it turns around! In the pod, Chris is distracted by this turn of events, and his eye is taken off what€™s happening to the robot he€™s driving, allowing Richard to hit Going on the side with the flywheel, flipping it over in a shower of sparks! But if Chris had taken his eye off of matters, so has Richard as Crunch gives MORD a belt in the butt! Crunch is bounced sideways in a shower of white sparks as Going flicks itself upright, only to be caught by the flywheel once more as MORD spins around!

The scoop of MORD is lowered as it goes after Crunch once more, catching it sideways with the scoop, and lifting it up and over as MORD drives it towards the pit! Going, meanwhile has self righted, but not in time to save Crunch, who vanishes into the moat just as Going spins around to drive at MORDs exposed rear! MORD hastily gets away from the scene of the crime as Going comes in to wreak vengeance, but is forced to spin around to once more face MORD as it drives away from the edge of the moat!

MORD comes in with the scoop lowered, and scoop meets wedge as the two contest to see who€™s lower. It all goes MORDs way though, as Going is pushed backwards, and is then gotten under by MORD! The scoop rises and Going is tipped over backwards, immediately self righting! This all goes according to Richard€™s plan though, as Going self rights straight onto the flywheel, and is knocked upwards, spinning in mid air and landing on its wheels! Again MORD drives forwards, tearing off Going€™s flipper and knocking it over again! With no flipper, Going is gone, but just to make sure, the scoop is lowered and Going is sent into the moat!

Going Crunch? More like Going Going Gone! MORD Moves Onwards Rather Dominantly, through to the series seen grand final!

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

Just one more fight to go before final time. Excited? No? Screw you too :P We move to Unimmediate Peril for this fight.

Wedga Revo started things off against fellow flipper Veg 2, before moving on to slay its first seed of the series, Archangel of the Abyss. Then another seed, and another big damager was to come in Dervish VI, beaten in Last €˜Bot Standing no less. If Wedga was suffering from two consecutive fights with big hitters, it wasn€™t showing this against Seggy the 3rd as it threw it from the ring in a matter of seconds.

Annoying Box Rush 2, on the other hand, had a shoving match against Wedge Devo, coming out on top thanks to the pit, before utilising its anti-spinner lead plate to great effect against first You Only Live Once, then Flaming Hell. It was less useful against Star 69, who managed to tear it off, but the result still went Nick€™s way.

3€¦
2€¦
1€¦..
ACTIVATE!!

And€¦ They€™re off! Both are away from their starting positions like a concrete block is about to be dropped on them! They meet with a crash in the centre with ABR just edging under Wedga and prising it up a bit, but it isn€™t on the scoop properly and falls back down to earth! With the scoop in its raised position, Wedga is able to get under quickly and flip ABR up and over! Things looks bad for ABR already as it lands on its upraised scoop and has to wriggle things around a bit before it can self right! Things aren€™t helped as Wedga isn€™t just leaving things be, and pushes ABR towards the wall as it self rights!

ABR does indeed self right, just as Wedga is coming in for the kill! Quickly it drives off, and Wedga crashes into the wall instead! ABR turns around to get at Wedga€™s side, but can€™t quite seem to scrape under the skirt! The lifter raises, flicking the skirt up with it, and quickly ABR drives forwards under the side and lifts Wedga up and over! Wedga flips itself away from ABR and the wall, where it spins around a bit before landing on its back and self righting again, but ABR soon smashes into it and shoves it back into the wall! Wedga spins on the spot, and manages to get under the side of ABR, and hurls it towards the centre of the arena where the light robot bounces and rolls back onto its wheels!

Both machines turn to face one another and charge, both outsmarting each other by turning away from the charge for a side attack, but both turning the same way and still resulting in a collision from which neither can effectively profit. ABR turns and manages to slide under the front of Wedga though, lifting and pushing forwards to roll it over! Wedga self rights instantly, crashing down on top of ABR before rolling off and falling back onto its back! ABR reverses, pushing the upside down Wedga towards the wall which interrupts its self righting, hammering Wedga into the wall, before turning around!

Wedga self rights as it does so though, once more hopping right on top of ABR! The scoop rises, pitching Wedga off, once more causing it to land on its back, and again it needs to self right! ABR catches it with the scoop as it does so though, and lifts it, pushing it towards the wall, trying to stack it! Wedga€™s flipper fires again though, pushing it away from ABR, where it rolls onto its wheels, and facing ABR€™s side! Taking advantage of the golden opportunity, Wedga drives forwards and flips, sending ABR right out of the arena!

ABR annoyingly rushed out of the arena, having been given an atomic Wedga. Wedga Revo moves onto the grand final!

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

And now, the final lot of arenas and draws...

3rd place playoff:

ABR vs Going Crunch - The Moat

Featherweight final:

Hells Angel vs TREADTHAL vs Maximum Velocity vs Alpha - Final battle arena

Lightweight final

Lithium vs Jo Mamma vs Hell Hound vs Crash - final battle arena

Middleweight final

Tom vs Fat Billy Sastards vs Black vs Blazer - final battle arena

Heavyweight final

MORD vs Wedga Revo - final battle arena.

The final battle arena

You should know it, its been around the past two series. However, for newcomers, this is how it goes.

It starts off as the classic arena. However, after two minutes, the walls are removed, making it like the moat, but with house robots. After three minutes, the house robots can go after anyone freely, and after four minutes the pit opens as well. Like last bot standing, there is no time limit.

[velociraptor]

NSBFL 7

Fantastic, I dont see that many finals!

Should be a good battle with AJ - all I can do is keep to the sides and rear, try and shove with the plow, get him against the wall and attack with the disc. Try and shove him over the side or in the pit when the time comes, and just try and damage with the disc if all else fails.

In the lightweight final, Crash will just ram everybody around and try to pit them or send them over the side.

[andrewj]

NSBFL 7

Tom vs Fat Billy Sastards vs Black vs Blazer

Flip whatever is in the way really. Try and get them all over the fence before the walls go down if possible.

MORD vs Wedga Revo

Should be a good one here... Hopefully my 360 degrees of low clearence should stop it getting under me. From there I can hopefully get under it, push it about, flip it over the wall, push it off the edge, put it in the pit, give it to the housies. Take your pick!

[steven_mcg]

NSBFL 7

FEATHERWEIGHT FINAL
Alpha VS Hells Angel VS Maximum Velocity VS T.R.E.D.T.H.A.L.

...um...outpush and pit Alpha, flip Hells Angel and dump out the ring, then try and repeat with Max.

Not much of a plan, but seeing as how Im going to get slaughtered, theres not much need for one

[razerdave]

NSBFL 7

hmmm. Alphas a box robot, no problem for the axe and scoop combo to get a hold of, The others Ill just have to axe to death, and stay well away from MVs flipper

[darkguru]

NSBFL 7

Hmm, might stack ABR on Crunch and suicide dive into the moat, failing that, if he does get one of my clusters into the moat first, i have a decent chance of pushing it off while its still on the edge, i just have to make sure that he cant get both off at the same time.

The clusters are going to split at once, obviously, but might work it so that next year, i have the option of keeping the pieces together while keeping both weapons active.

[darkguru]

NSBFL 7

Oh, and nice reference to my comedy three part cluster

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

The story so far

Well, I officially dubbed NSBFL 2 as the great seed massacre, and it looks like NSBFL 7 wanted to follow in it€™s footsteps. This year we€™ve had shocks, controversies, strange election results and affairs! But enough of what€™s happening in the real world, there were some mighty strange goins-ons in the NSBFL too.

In Heat A it looked like business as usual as number one seed Achilles easily disposed of the Vampire Twins, while there was a huge tussle in another arena for the dubious right of facing the champ between Call Out Hook and Sonic Boom. It was Call Out hook who folded the cards first, having been smashed into submission by the mace of Sonic Boom! Business as normal went into bankruptcy however. Sonic Boom refused to be intimidated , and beat down the champ in a close judges decision!
Heat B was along next, with Dervish VI facing an opponent it had previously dismantled with ease. Bisyamonten hadn€™t changed, but nearly put the whirling Dervish into the moat on several occasions! Damaged ruled the day though, the God of War was slain again. Artros had rookie problems, facing a more experienced team in El Persistence. It was rammed until it broke. This didn€™t work in the heat final though, as it was Dervish€™s spinning that did all the breaking. El Persistence wasn€™t persistent enough!
While Dervish had shown the way for the seeds, Sheer Hell couldn€™t follow in Heat C. It doesn€™t like being flipped, and Stratos-Fear is all about flippage. Two flips and the seed was hurled from the arena. BIACS-LE and Heir to Black Panther 4 put on a much lengthier display, which was still one sided traffic. Thanks to the design of BIACS-LE, Heir to Black Panther couldn€™t do much against it and was knocked out by the odd spinner. Unfortunately for Matty, the reverse was true in the heat final. Stratos-Fear bypassed ingenuity with brute force and flipped BIACS-LE into submission.
In Heat D, Hell Machines traditional in your face and tear it off methods were put to the test against Star 69, and were shockingly found to be lacking! Star 69 squeezed through on a close judges decision. On the other side of the fence, Son of Ripper made its NSBFL return with a win over NSA thanks to writer incompetence. A rewrite was refused, so on it went. Thanks to Andy€™s um€¦ unique idea of trying to flip a full body spinner while it was spinning at its fullest, Son of Ripper eventually lost its flipper plate. Star 69 still ended up in the moat, but not before Son of Ripper had disappeared itself. Star 69 went through!
Heat E was next, and another former champ was in action! Venom had difficulties with the invertible Die-Ceratops Invertus though, and ran out of gas trying to finish it off! Chris capitalised, and the ex champ was gone. MORD took on 360 next. As someone predicted, letters beat numbers, and 360 went out in style over the fence! It was a battle of the invertibles in the heat final, with MORD coming out on top thanks to the timely intervention of a Roulette pit.
At the start of Heat F, it was the battle of the axes as Battle Raptor 3 took on Hakce doff Ha-Ka, who was very hacked off after loosing when Battle Raptor pushed it into the pit. While this was going on, Ankle Biter Evo was unable to function properly after Crush 2 disabled its weapon and drive, and so it was counted out. Crush 2 wasn€™t able to get a munch in on Battle Raptor, so Richard€™s machine became only the second to get through!
Heat G started off in a blink. V€™Ger quickly stopped the spinner on Circuit Breaker and upended it, while GeForce set out to quickly throw Got Bot from the ring and did just that! It was a tougher fight for both machine sin the heat final though, which V€™Ger eventually won after tearing a panel off GeForce and attacking the very innards.
It was Heat H next, and Kruel Intent didn€™t have much work to do against Pink Panther, which was let down by its woefully inefficient drive which soon burnt out. ForcePower Turbo and Flaming Hell was a different affair though. Neither could do much to the other, and as it was a Last €˜Bot Standing battle, we were in for a long night. ForcePower€™s batteries solved the problem by eventually losing their power. The heat final between Kruel Intent and Flaming Hell was a quick and violent affair, and both ended up falling down a pit! The judges decided and found Kruel Intent to be lacking. Flaming hell went through.
Heat I started off with a fight between the seeded Love Bite and the Revenge Of The Far Too Long Name. Love Bite was bludgeonated to death, and Steve€™s machine went on. Think Tank proved no match for Glasgow Kiss, and was sent packing back to the US of A in an expensive lesson in what happens when robots with a real budget go against those without. It was the end of the affair soon after for Glasgow Kiss though, Revenge of the Revenge of the Bludgeonater did what its name implied. Well. More like what its name emphatically stated.
Heat J started how Alex meant for it to carry on. Violently, as Archangel of the Abyss proved just too much for Cyclone Force 2, and took it to pieces. The battle of the flippers was next, as Wedga Revo took on Veg 2. It was a back and forth and upwards affair, ended when Veg 2 was shown the camera track. Next, it was the age old battle between spinner and flipper. Flipper won the day when the Archangel vanished into the moat.
Former PTT champ Beta couldn€™t win a second tournament in Heat K, as it was designed for metal floors, and performed badly on a wooden surface. With nothing to stop it bouncing on the swing, it had no control, and the fight was ended early when the arena became damaged. Going Crunch went through. When SDIV was inverted by Panicking, the saw became too high to do anything to Martyn€™s machine. Panicking won an uneven fight. Going Crunch was a different kettle of coffee though. Mmm, coffee. Panicking became beached on crunch after a flip from Going and the cluster €˜bot went though.
Heat L was just that for tenth seed Drilla Killa 7. The former tag team champ was flipped around by Tiger Shark, and in the Last €˜Bot Standing arena, being stacked is death. That€™s what happened to it. Push-Ish vs Squish was one sided from the get go. Squish didn€™t have the power to self right, and had no answer when it found it needed to. Tiger Shark looked badly outclassed by Push-Ish, but made good use of its flipper and the house robots to take a judges decision and become the only real robot to make the semies.
Heat M started with double M in the form of Manic Monsoon, going through over Orka Mk 3 after its too low ground clearance betrayed, and grounded it. Deep Impact looked impressive on paper, but Agitator proved that paper can be torn easily, causing bad damage to its weapons and body, eventually spinning it into the moat. It didn€™t last long against Manic Monsoon though, as it had no shrimech, and the seed could put it in a position where it needed one.
In Heat N, Seggy the 3rd beat the impressive looking Flipping Hell with two flips. The first sent it over, and then Flipping hell€™s self righting flip sent it too high up and broke itself. Insecticide looked to have the Doomsday Project deactivated with a typical three seconds left on the clock after breaking its weapon, but then the Roulette arena claimed it. The weapon of The Doomsday Project broke again against Seggy the 3rd, but this time there was no random pit to save Steve€™s bacon, and the seed went through!
The Deer, being too low to be hit by the weapon of Powerpoint Reaches Preassurepoint at the start of Heat O. However, it still almost ended up being pushed backwards into the moat, winning by dropping PRP in instead. Hefty Kick in the Balls did just that to Black Chalkie Beard, spinning both parts into the moat, but still not damaging them much. However the weapon let it down after The Deer began ruthlessly smacking the weapon into the walls in order to break it, then broke the rest of Hefty too.
And finally was Heat P, and another seed exits stage pit, as Annoying Box Rush 2 defeated Wedge Devo in a lengthy, if one sided pushing match. You Only Live Once took down the Ringwraith, first by beheading its big bird thing then saying €œActually I€™m a woman, so stuff that up you€™re no man can kill me prophesy€. It was no match for ABR though, and soon had its own weapon and hopes broken.

Newbies: 10. Seeds: 6.

It was a change of pace now, as the middleweights came out to strut their violent stuff. In the first melee, Tom made good against Pure and Collision Force, sending one into the moat after the other broke down. Fat Billy Sastards and Evil Scotsman dismantled Heavy Metal Noise, taking it in turns to rip bits off. Then billy got bored, and that was bad news for the Scotsman. Killoteeny and Black ganged up on Scarlek, lifting and hammering it back to scar-o The last fight was a quick affair. Blizzard was sent down a Roullete pit, and Hell-Fire was sent to join it before the trap could close. Blazer went through.

Round two in the heavyweight draw now, and things were started off by Sonic Boom and Revenge of the Revenge of the Bludgeonater. Steve had similar problems to Call Out Hook earlier, and the result was the same. Sonic Boom went through.
Dervish VI next went up against Wedga Revo in the last €˜bot standing arena. It was the flipper who won though, breaking Dervish down with flip after flip. Another seed bites the stuff that accumulates in un-swept rooms!
Stratos-Fear managed to destroy Crunch with one flip, but Going proved tougher prey, and the much larger robot ended up in the moat instead!
Star 69 had two close fights in the heat, but showed exactly what it could do against Tiger Shark, ripping the real robot a new one.
Manic Monsoon was on fire against MORD, which was odd as the NSBFL arena doesn€™t have flame pits. MORD came back into its stride though and sent the 8th seed into the pit.
Seggy the 3rd took control against Battle Raptor, and didn€™t seem inclined to let go of it. The seed went through in fine style.
The Deer and V€™Ger had a stalemated battle. The Deer took damage, but grappled onto V€™Ger for a lot of the fight, controlling the pace of the match. The judges decided, and The Deer went through.
Annoying Box Rush again lived up to its name against Flaming Hell, rushing in, stopping the spinner, turning it over and then putting it in the moat just to be on the safe side.

Newbies: 5. Seeds: 3.

Things got lighter again, as the lightweights came out to play. And they play rough. Lithium won the first melee, taking out Miss Dee Meaner and Little Big Bot in the process. Jo Mamma dominated Ringo Scarr and Manic Aggressive. Um€¦ That didn€™t come out right, but whatever. Hell Hound was dogged, and damaged the weapon of Triskaidekaphobia so it couldn€™t spin, and then the body of RCRQL so it couldn€™t move. Crash was the last one through, beating Mad Cow and Gridlock in an action packed fight.

Back to the heavies, and Sonic Boom€™s successful run came to an end at the hands of MORD. Well, more like the scoop of MORD and the pit, but whatever, who€™s counting? Oh, you are? *destroys your calculator*. I win again!
Annoying Box Rush was up next, taking on Star 69. Annoying Box Rush had been relying on an anti spinner lead plate to get past all those heavy hitters, but Star 69 managed to tear it off! The result wasn€™t changed though, as Star 69 still fell to the annoying rusher.
The fight between Wedga Revo and Seggy the 3rd was over almost before it started. Seggy was hurled from the ring in seconds!
Going Crunch€™s unprecedented winning streak continued with a win over The Deer, with Martyn€™s robot beached on Going, who was unable to flip it off thanks to a broken flipper!

Featherweight action was up next. Hells Angel started off the action, beating real robots Pillow Torque and Scorpion Junior, then TREADTHAL followed it by beating Storm Vortex and Micro Monsoon. A slimmed down Maximum Velocity won after old rivals Sparkstorm and Overdrive concentrated more on each other, and last through was Alpha 1 winning against Blue and Combat Raptor.

And finally, in the heavyweight finals, MORD finally put Going Crunch away€¦ Down the moat, after some initial problems with fighting two robots. Wedga Revo meanwhile had some annoying box rush problems, but soon rushed the rusher and threw it over the arena fence!

Now we move into the moat for€¦

3rd place playoff

It€™s Going Crunch vs Annoying Box Rush. We know how they got there, so let€™s get the party started!

3€¦
2€¦
1€¦..
ACTIVATE!!

ABR charges forwards at the separating cluster immediately! Going gets out of the way, but Crunch is taken from behind and pushed towards the moat, just managing to slip away from an early bath in the moat! Going comes up behind ABR, hoping to send it down, but ABR quickly reverses away and past Going, who turns in an effort to get under it as it goes by! This almost works perfectly, the flipper fires and ABR is bounced up, stalling it long enough for Crunch to come in with the spinner, denting the armour and spinning itself away!

Going uses the time to come in properly and flip ABR over! The larger machine self rights though, causing Going to miss it with the next attack, and ABR is in a perfect position to then flip over Going! Going self rights as Crunch comes in again, clipping the rear of ABR, but Nick€™s machine isn€™t fazed, and catches the self righting Going on the scoop, once more flipping it over and pushing it towards the moat! Crunch comes in behind ABR as it pushes Going, trying to stop the inexorable charge!

Going is unceremoniously dumped into the moat, and Crunch slams into the rear of ABR, trying to send it in afterwards, but it just doesn€™t have the weight to budge it! ABR simply reverses, bullying Crunch out of the way as it does so, and turns to face Crunch! Crunch hits the scoop with its spinner, deflecting itself from harms way. ABR turns to face it again though, getting under the almost stationary spinner and lifting Crunch up and over! Things look bad for the cluster €˜bot as ABR gets under Crunch before it can self right and starts pushing it moat-wards! Things look worse when Crunch is dumped into the moat as well!

Annoying Box Rush wins a no-nonsense bout to claim 3rd place! Going crunch wins a commiseration wooden spoon.

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

Coming up next: I finally get this bloody tourney finished.

[mrdaves]

NSBFL 7

Wow, nice outro Franky

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

Non-stop action now, as we hit the Final Battle arena for four finals in a row. I hope you didn€™t pay for an entire seat, because you€™ll only need the edge!

Featherweight final

Hell€™s Angel vs TREADTHAL vs Maximum Velocity vs Alpha 1

3€¦
2€¦
1€¦..
ACTIVATE!!

Well it€™s a tentative start in this fight, as all four edge forwards, perhaps none wanting to be the first to attack in case the second attack comes while they€™re preoccupied. Whatever the reason it€™s a slow start as the four circle each other, until a whole ten seconds into the fight when Dave gets bored with the lack of carnage, and Hell€™s Angel charges straight at Maximum Velocity! The axe smashes down onto the top, but Maximum Velocity shrugs off the powerful blow and throws Hells Angel over! Hells Angel self rights, and is almost caught unawares by Alpha 1, but TREADTHAL comes in, clamps the real robot with the axe and lifts it up!

As Maximum Velocity throws Hells Angel over again, TREADTHAL starts to parade the real robot along the arena, and looks to be doing a victory lap of all things, ending by dumping Alpha 1 into the CPZ containing Flipupabit! The house robot makes short work of flipping Alpha 1 out of there again, and the compact box bounces along, and ends up right way up! Instead of going for revenge on TREADTHAL though, it heads back towards Hells Angel and Maximum Velocity. While TREADTHAL was doing its thing, Maximum Velocity had thrown Hells Angel up and over a couple of times, not even waiting for it to self right.

Hells Angel self rights this time, however, just in time to narrowly avoid being pushed by Alpha 1. The axe comes down again though, right on top of Alpha 1! Dave keeps up the punishment on Alpha 1, badly scarring and denting the top, before having to reverse away as Maximum Velocity comes in. TREADTHAL makes its presence known again though, this time getting under Maximum Velocity and lifting it up and over, before axing at the base! Maximum Velocity tries to self right, but TREADTHAL is in the way and Maximum Velocity just falls back onto its flipper.

Hells Angel ignores Alpha 1 for now, and joins TREADTHAL in attacking Maximum Velocity, but Alpha 1 isn€™t ignoring Hell€™s Angel, crashing into the side and driving it into Mini Militant€™s CPZ, holding it in while the flywheel hits Hells Angel a couple of times before it€™s spun out! Meanwhile, Alpha 1€™s intervention knocked Maximum Velocity to the side, so it self rights, and gets away from TREADTHAL, but it looks to be hobbling a bit! Still, it gets under TREADTHAL and throws it over, flipping it backwards until its flipped straight onto the flipper plate of Flipupabit, and TREADTHAL receives the same treatment Alpha 1 received not too long ago!

On the other side of the arena, Hells Angel has gotten back into position to attack Alpha 1. Alpha 1 is pinned against the wall, and the finger of Dave is just about to press down on Alpha 1€¦ When the inbound flight of TREADTHAL comes to an abrupt landing, crashing into the back of Hells Angel, knocking it away sufficiently for Alpha 1 to escape. As it does so, it passes Maximum Velocity who is fully in pursuit of TREADTHAL, and flips it again onto the top of Hell€™s Angel, and then Alpha 1 returns, ramming into the back of Maximum Velocity, flying right under the flipper machine as it does so, ending up underneath the two axe robots, while Maximum Velocity is wedged under the two axe machines and beached on Alpha 1.

None of the machines move for a while, until the axe fires on TREADTHAL, toppling it from the group! Then the axe of Hells Angel fires and it starts to slide off, but is then thrown off as Maximum Velocity fires its flipper. The flipper fires again, catapulting Maximum Velocity off of Alpha 1 and onto its back. Alpha 1 reverses, pushing Maximum Velocity backwards and into the self righting Hell€™s Angel. All this occurs just in time, as the first of three sirens goes off and the walls are raised, revealing the moat!

An evil glint is in Scott€™s eye, as Maximum Velocity lines up and charges€¦ Mini Militant. Maximum Velocity takes a blow on the flipper plate, but is soon back on the attack and flips Mini Militant into the moat! While this is happening, TREADTHAL has managed to clamp onto Alpha 1 and raised it up. Not taking any heroics, Steve just drops Alpha 1 in, and the first contestant is eliminated! Hells Angel, meanwhile, has taken the safe ground of the arena centre, and both Maximum Velocity and TREADTHAL come in to meet it!

Never one to back away from a fight, Hells Angel goes after the already damaged Maximum Velocity and hammers onto the top from the side, pushing it sideways as it does so! Maximum Velocity fires the flipper to push Hells Angel away and flips it over, only for TREADTHAL to come in from the side and do the same to Maximum Velocity! Not wanting the damaged underbelly exploited further, Maximum Velocity self rights immediately, clipping off TREADTHAL and falling back onto its back. A second flip, and it€™s on its wheels again, only for TREADTHAL to come in, clamp and raise it!

This doesn€™t work too well this time, as Maximum Velocity isn€™t an easily clamp-able shape, and a flipper fire does the rest of the work, and Maximum Velocity falls to its wheels again, flipping over TREADTHAL! Hells Angel axes TREADTHAL before it can self right using the axe, but then just goes back after Maximum Velocity. I don€™t know what Dave€™s got against Scott either, as Maximum Velocity once more throws over Hells Angel, drives it towards the moat and fires it forwards! Hells Angel almost goes in, and self rights immediately!

Maximum Velocity can€™t capitalise, because TREADTHAL has got back into the action, axed the top and flipped Maximum Velocity over again! Hells Angel meanwhile, is having problems. It€™s so near the moat that half the wheels have gone over! It can€™t move properly because of this, and as it tries to turn away, it vanishes down the moat without anyone€™s help! Maximum Velocity isn€™t doing too much better itself. It€™s suffered a couple more blows to the base which were dangerous near the wheel before managing to self right! The second siren goes off, and TREADTHAL backs off as Micro Bane comes in! Maximum Velocity self rights, but only seems to be able to go in circles! It manages to turn away from Micro Bane, but that only delays the inevitable, as TREADTHAL comes in again, turning Maximum Velocity over and pushing it easily into the moat!

Alpha 1 got beta-n and met its Omega, Hell€™s Angel went to the bad place, and Maximum Velocity ran outta gas! I guess I can€™t do the TREADTHAL = DREADTHAL joke, because it wins the featherweight final! Congratulations, Steve!

Lightweight final

Lithium vs Jo Mamma vs Hell Hound vs Crash

3€¦
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And they€™re off! Jo Mamma backs away to get the spinning bar up to speed, while Lithium edges towards the arena centre. Crash goes after Hell Hound and throws it over, before heading after Jo Mamma to stop it spinning up! The bat hits Crash, deflecting it from the attack, and Lithium comes to join in the fun, going disc to bar with Jo Mamma! Sparks fly and neither seem badly affected by the collision. Jo Mamma is very badly affected by Crash though, who slips under the stalled bar and flips over Jo Mamma! Jo Mamma lacks that essential thing we call a €œshrimech€, and is counted out, while Hell Hound self rights and nips onto the back of Lithium!

It€™s a bit of a struggle, but Hell Hound is able to get partway through the thick armour of Lithium. Crash gets under Hell Hound while it€™s busy, and flips! However, Crash lacks the power to sort out both robots, and so the two are only bounced up a bit, Hell Hound retaining its grip on Lithium. Hell Hound pushes Lithium forwards, with Crash worrying the pair like a sheepdog, Richard looking for an opening to get in and flip either robot. Hell Hound drives Lithium into the wall disc first in a shower of sparks, and lets go. Crash instantly dives in and flips Lithium over and over, sending it into Baby Tomahawk€™s CPZ!

Crash turns its attention to Hell Hound now. These two may have been tag team champs together, but it seems there€™s no truce here! Hell Hound is tossed over onto its back, and Crash looks dominant as it heads over to Lithium again, who has flipped over Baby Tomahawk with its disc after taking a couple of axe blows that didn€™t do much damage at all! Crash flips Lithium again, causing its disc to strike sparks up from the floor and it bounces up again, Crash flipping it towards the wall! Crash strays too near the CPZ though, and is attacked by the self righted and damaged Baby Tomahawk! Crash flips the house robot over, but gets attacked by Lithium!

Crash is flipped in a shower of sparks, and takes another blow, curling up one of the armour plates a bit! Crash reverses hurriedly, before self righting so it can use its flipper as Hell Hound gets Lithium by the side, and pins it in Baby Tomahawk€™s CPZ, who thanks Lithium for the new scar with blow after blow from the axe! Hell Hound is forced to release Lithium after a while, who isn€™t in a position to pay Hell Hound back just yet, so goes after Crash instead! Crash dodges the first attack, and Hell Hound turns to face the two as they circle each other as they search for an opening, with Dave and Hell Hound seemingly content to wait for a while to see what happens!

Crash gets in under Lithum€™s side, receiving a slight tap from the disc as it does and throws it over, but Lithium just turns right around and catches Crash with the disc on the side, bounding itself up though as the disc is swinging down. This is soon reversed though, as Crash comes in for another flip! Scott out drives Richard in this little exchange though, and the flipper of Crash is torn right off! Now Hell Hound€™s coming back into the fun, as Lithium flips over Crash with a blow to the side! The armour on Crash is holding up well though.

Lithium turns to attack Hell Hound now, catching it on the side and tearing a gash in the armour! Scott looks well on top as Lithium attacks Hell Hound again, flipping hell Hound over and revealing some of Hell Hound€™s innards, but Crash comes back in and gets under the side of Lithium and slams it into the arena wall! Lithium is jarred free, and flips Crash with its disc again, but Hell Hound comes in and grips dangerously near one of the wheels of Lithium as the first siren is sounded off and the walls rise!

Crash smashes into Hell Hounds side, trying to get both it and Lithium over the side! Hell Hound reverses though, letting Lithium go as it does so, and Lithium too escapes Crash€™s plunge. Crash almost doesn€™t though, and stops just in time. All three robots are perilously near the moat, but none are in a position to capitalise! Crash recovers first. All it needs to do is reverse, after all. Lithium and Hell Hound both turn away from the edge and drive away to the arena centre, all three too glad to still be in the fight to bother about starting it again at the moment.

It€™s Crash who breaks the momentary treaty first, driving into the side of Hell Hound and pushing it back towards the moat. Hell Hound escapes though, and Crash swerves around to attack again, only to back off as Lithium comes back in! Hell Hound gets to grips with Lithium again though, driving it towards the moat with Crash in pursuit. Dave is almost clairvoyant here, as he gets a clear vision of the future. Hell hound pushes Lithium into the moat, only for Crash to push Hell Hound in. Well like hell that€™s going to happen!

Hell Hound lets go of Lithium, and Crash immediately flies into action, going for the nearly moated Lithium, only to be fielded by Hell Hound and swung into the moat itself! Lithium, meanwhile has gotten away from the moat again, and Hell Hound is in hot pursuit! Lithium suddenly swings around and catches Hell Hound a belt on the so far undamaged side, knocking Hell Hound over! Hell Hound starts to self right, but Lithium attacks again, righting Hell Hound anyway but also tearing off one of the self righting legs!

Hell Hound backs away from another attack, and keeps backing off as Lithium closes the gap. The gap remains a gap though, as Hell Hound also reaches its top speed, which is identical to Lithium€™s. Hell Hound suddenly swerves away, and Lithium goes shooting past, giving Dave and Hell hound some breathing space! Hell Hound goes for the side of Lithium, only for Dave to slam the brakes on as the disc of Lithium turns to face Hell Hound again! Hell Hound swerves away from the attack, and the second siren wails! The house robots start closing in, but Hell Hound has managed to get a grip on the rear of Lithium! Not playing around any more, Hell Hound pushes Lithium into the moat! Dave thinks once or twice about attacking the house robots too, but decides against it as Hell Hound is already damaged. Flipupabit still pushes it into the moat though.

Jo Mamma is so fat, she can€™t even get up! Richard€™s machine Crashed and burned, while Lithium wasn€™t exactly in its element! Hell Hound wins the Lightweight final, and congratulations to Dave W!

[pcbore]

NSBFL 7

Middleweight final

Tom vs Fat Billy Sastards vs Black vs Blazer

Billy hangs around at the start to spin up, but Dave is having none of that, and Black goes straight for it! Billy backs away, still spinning, but the swords get under and lift it over! Meanwhile, Tom and Blazer are having a battle of the flippers, with Blazer managing to get under Tom€™s side and flipping it over! Tom self rights quickly and stylishly though, avoiding a repeat attack by Blazer as it does so! Billy apparently taken care of, Black comes to join in the fun, and lifts Blazer up and over!

Billy is inverted, but spinning around on its shell. As the body goes faster and faster it almost tips over a few times. It stays on its side though, so the counter begins, and it looks like the spinner who was so dominant in its melee is going home! On the other side of the arena, Tom has flipped Black backwards, followed by Blazer, and flips it towards the wall, hoping to eject its fellow flipper quickly! Black interrupts it though, pushing it into the wall and lifting it up, beaching it on the wall for a whole second before Tom self rights away from it!

Black is just starting to lift Tom up again though, when Black is jarred away and Tom is dislodged. Well, an angry full body spinner slamming into the back of your machine will do that. Billy had self righted with just two seconds left on the timer! Now it€™s back in the fight and going after Black, and we have four robots again! Billy goes after Black again, smacking into the side of Black and knocking it away in a spin! The two flippers are going at it again, with Blazer flipping Tom up and over a couple of times before Tom avoids the next attack!

Tom is soon getting revenge though, flipping Blazer onto its back, then getting under again as it self rights, and shoving Blazer not into the CPZs, but the whirling dervish that is Fat Billy Sastards! Blazer is spun away, one of the wheel guards torn completely off! Black takes the time to flip Billy over again, before going after the two duelling flippers, where Blazer has once more flipped over Tom! Black gets under Tom this time, lifting it over with the forks and pushing it towards the wall. Two minutes haven€™t yet passed though, so Dave is at a loss for what to do while waiting for the moat to appear. This is solved when Blazer charges in and flips Black over!

Billy meanwhile has self righted at a quicker rate this time, having been going pretty quickly when flipped over. It goes over to the fight again and instead of going for the hardox casing of Black which it has only managed to dent, it smashes into the exposed wheel of Blazer! The effect isn€™t pretty for Blazer fans, as the wheel is not only mangled but torn off! Tom adds insult to injury by flipping Blazer up and over again, but the nearby Billy smacks into Tom as well, gashing the armour in a shower of white sparks which makes the crowd ahhhh and oooh. You€™re not at a firework festival, people!

Black comes in to flip Billy again, but Billy reverses sharply. Matty has had two near heart attacks already and isn€™t keen to add a third in case the word near is omitted. He€™s aided by Tom, who takes the opportunity to flip Black over again as the first siren goes off and the walls are raised! Chris wastes no time, gets under Black and flips it into the moat! We€™re two machines down, as Blazer has just been counted out, and Flipup pushes both Blazer and its wheel into the moat. Tom reverses away from the moat quickly, as Billy drives in to try and belt it in!

Tom drives forwards again though. Billy has just driven itself between Tom and the moat, and Chris is eager to win what I believe would be his first title. Nothing doing though, Billy retreats and Tom reverses back to the relative safety of the arena centre. Billy comes after it, and Chris bites the bullet, charging forwards with Tom and trying to flip Billy! Billy is flipped, but just rolls straight back to its wheels! Tom comes in again, but Billy catches it in the side, spinning it away with another wound! Tom is a bit sluggish to get moving again, and isn€™t helped when Billy crashes in again! Tom isn€™t moving now, so Bane comes in to have a look€¦ Nope. Tom is counted out after a valiant battle.

Blazer has been extinguished, and Black is taught two heads really are better than one. Tom€™s been hit by an anvil for the fifth time this week and it€™s only Tuesday! Fat Billy Sastards takes first place in the middleweights! Incidentally, Matty, do you know how many times I almost made a fatal mistype of your robot€™s name? You pheasant plucker you!

Heavyweight final

MORD vs Wedga Revo

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Both machines are new to this war, but they€™re veterans of many other tournaments, so this could get interesting. MORD has come into the arena with its scoop raised, and the disc is already starting to spin as MORD and Wedga circle each other, neither willing to take a chance on the first move and looking for a sure fire opening. Eventually with neither getting a tactical advantage, Andy decides to trust in the strength of his scoop and gets in under MORD€™s flywheel! Sparks fly and MORD is bounced backwards by the blow, and Wedga drives forwards again, succeeding in flipping MORD over and backwards!

MORD lands with a thump, but soon manages to get out of the way of Andy€™s next attack. Wedga has had some quick victories over good opponents, and Richard€™s determined that won€™t happen to him in his second shot at the title! MORDs scoop lowers to prevent the flywheel being stalled. It€™s just as well, as Wedga is coming in again! Scoop meets scoop€¦ Stalemate! Wedga has the better pushing power though, and MORD is edged backwards. MORD twists away from Wedga, and Wedga goes shooting past before regaining control and turning around, but that€™s enough time for MORD to go on the attack!

MORD crashes into Wedga€™s side, but the scoop can€™t seem to get under Wedga€™s skirts! Deciding to chance it, Richard raises the scoop and attacks the side with the flywheel in a shower of sparks Wedga is bounced up, but the flywheel has been stalled, so MORD is unable to keep up the preassure! The scoop lowers again as Wedga reverses away, and again the two meet scoop to scoop. MORD twists away again, but so does Wedga! Both go back on the attack, but it€™s Wedga who scores and gets under MORD€™s side!

MORD is thrown sideways across the arena, bouncing up! Wedga takes the opportunity and gets under MORD again, driving it to the wall and throwing it! MORD crashes into the wall near the top and things seem to go into slow motion! MORD is sitting on the wall precariously, and slowly topples€¦ Back into the arena! Wedga is charging in again, but MORD gets the scoop down just in time! MORD is edged backwards into the wall and can€™t get back any more€¦ But Wedga can still go forwards!

Unfortunately for Andy, Wedga goes forwards onto MORDs scoop, not under it! The scoop raises, lifting Wedga up, and MORD drives forwards, driving the flywheel into Wedga€™s base plate, blasting Wedga backwards and onto its back, with a small crack appearing in the base! Wedga self rights, but MORD is back on the attack with the flywheel at full speed, attacking one of the sides and knocking Wedga back over! Wedga has barely self righted again when it finds itself on its back once more! MORD attacks again when Wedga is down, bouncing it up, but the flywheel has stalled again so the scoop is lowered!

Wedga self rights, but it looks like one of the skirts has been bent upwards slightly. MORD goes for that side to see if it can get under, but the question remains unanswered as Wedga drives forwards and away. MORD may be faster, but Wedga has better acceleration and uses it to its full advantage to escape. MORD gives chase, but Wedga turns to face it again and once more the two scoops meet! Either Richard didn€™t quite lower the scoop properly, or it€™s a freak 1-100 chance, but there is no stalemate and Wedga slips right under MORD, driving it towards the wall and flipping!

Once more, MORD fails to be ejected from the fight, and is still in contention for the title and drives towards Wedga. Yet again scoop meets scoop as the first siren goes off. The walls are rising, and MORD is edged backwards! With no room to manoeuvre, Richard tries lowering the scoop even more, taking the front two wheels off the ground! The extra weight on the scoop pays off though, and Wedga is scooped once more, before being raised up and having another whack on the base plate from the flywheel!

Wedga self rights, but unfortunately for Andy, the scoop has been moved right out of the way, and Wedga self rights straight onto the flywheel and is bounced off with a small piece coming out of the base plate! Luckily for Andy it was nowhere near the wheels, or we could be crowning a new champ right now! Wedga self rights again, Richard not getting MORD into a new intercepting position in time. MORD is in time to attack the side of Wedga though, bouncing it up, but not over! The scoop lowers, but not quickly enough to attack the side of Wedga!

Wedga takes off away from MORD to get some breathing, and more importantly, turning space. With the walls out of the question, all each robot needs is one clear cut chance and the title is theirs! MORD comes after Wedga again. Richard€™s been around the game long enough to know that when you€™re on a roll it€™s important to stay there! Wedga turns, but not quite quick enough as MORD gets to the side of Wedga! Worse still, it€™s the side with the bent skirt, and MORD is indeed able to slip under quite nicely!

The scoop lifts before Andy can slam forward drive on, and Wedga€™s wheels are off the ground! MORD has the opponent at its mercy and the title in its grasp as it drives forwards with Wedga, but Andy is equally determined to get that title! Trying all sides of drive, he finds that none are any good! Panicking, he hits the flipper button, and Wedga flips itself right out of danger! Richard has top slam on the brakes, or MORD will vanish into the moat! He does so!

Wedga tries to self right, but the base hits the side of MORD and it falls back onto its flipper! MORD turns around to push Wedga again, but Wedga self rights just in time, doing a 540 degree flip and ending up behind MORD! This would be ideal for Andy, if MORD and Wedga weren€™t facing away from each other. Wedga and MORD both turn around and drive almost side by side to the arena centre, when the other siren goes off and the house robots start to look restless!

Flipup moves in to attack Wedga, but Andy doesn€™t think any of that will be happening today! Wedga gets under the side of Flipup, and takes the house robot to the arena centre, flipping it into the moat! Richard grins, and turns MORD to face The Militant, wedging his robot into the T shape to be safe from the flywheel, and moating that too, keeping the scoop raise to attack Uncle Tomahawk as it comes in with the axe! Uncle Tomahawk self rights, but this places it in an ideal place for MORD to knock it into the moat with the flywheel!

Andy, meanwhile is having a blast, and Wedga goes after the only house robot left, Bane! Wedga easily gets under the side, but from there things don€™t quite go to plan. Bane is bounced up slightly and drops back down on Wedga! Andy tries to reverse Wedga out, but he can€™t! Wedga is stuck under the massive house robot, immobilised and the clock is ticking down! Then from out of nowhere, MORD comes in and manages to lift Bane just enough for Wedga to escape! Wedga tries flipping Bane again, managing to bounce it a little further up! MORD keeps Bane raised as Wedga flips again, and slowly, inexorably, Bane is finally toppled for the first time!

MORD and Wedga back away from each other, the equivalent of not taking cheap shots and shaking hands after a job well done. Andy doesn€™t want to go scoop to scoop again now that Richard has found a counterattack for it, and so the two circle for a while, both waiting for the other to make a slight mistake€¦ Or blink. It€™s MORD who breaks the stalemate first, going after the side of Wedga with the scoop! It€™s the undamaged skirted side though, so Andy isn€™t too worried€¦ Until the scoop rises!

Wedga goes into forward drive immediately as Andy knows he can€™t afford for Wedga to be flipped again. If anything he doesn€™t know how much gas he€™s got left! However this places MORD behind Wedga, and it gives chase! Wedga€™s acceleration is better, but once MORD reaches top speed it catches up, catching Wedga a blow on the rear and knocking it up! MORD drives forwards, lowering the scoop as it does so, catching Wedga as the back end drops back down, and flips Wedga over completely, driving Wedga towards the moat! Wedga self rights, but still has its back facing MORD! MORD keeps driving forwards, and gets under the rear of Wedga, still driving forwards and lifting Wedga€™s wheels off the ground! The flipper fires again, but doesn€™t free Wedga this time! Wedga is pushed forwards the last couple if inches, and vanishes into the moat!

A hard fight from Wedga, but second place is all it wins. Congratulations, Richard, MORD is the NSBFL 7 champ, and is truly the Master of Robotic Destruction!