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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
@ Melissa & Steve - dont be overconfident. ANYTHING can happen here.
Ill post the fights soon.
@ Melissa & Steve - dont be overconfident. ANYTHING can happen here.
Ill post the fights soon.
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
Id still like to know why people bother posting tactics when the fights are usually ended by something random anyway
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
I use the tactics for fillers.
A pirate vs. Mini Fridge
House fighters are Asterix & Taki.
The pirate isnt really happy now that hes thrown his possessions away, and is certainly down in the dumps, as you might say. The pirate randomly lurches forwards, stumbling around in a kind of stupor. Not that itll do him any good, but maybe its a sort of dance...or not, as the pirate trips over himself and crashes oonto Asterixs house of sticks. Asterix emits a howl of rage and retaliates by mashing the pirate in the kisser with a supercharged fist, sending the lily-livered keelhauler sprawling to the ground. The pirate decides that Asterix is actually the opponent and fights with him, resulting in him getting beaten to a pulp, but still not defeated owing to the fact that he is still functional in many areas, not excluding his spine and his mental capabilities. He then spots a lone fridge at the end of the arena. As Asterix comes forward with another swinging blow the pirate ducks under the fist and leaps at the fridge, ripping open the door with such ferocity that the door comes off. Spotting a bottle of Captain Morgans rum he goes wide-eyed, and spluttering with glee he reaches for it. However, due to the stupidity of the pirate he does not realize that a titanium fist has sprang from the depths of the fridge and a WHAM and CRACK! tell us that the mandible of the pirate has been broken neatly. Asterix catches up to the pirate a second later and finishes the job, and all thats left of the pirate is an eye-patch. Weird, because the pirates eyes were both fine.
Mini-Fridge advances to Round 3!
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Arael vs. Blaze Ya Dead Homie
House fighters are Ancalagon & Cortez.
The angel of light attacks off the bat, sending shafts of lightnings down on the rapper. Blaze grabs his trusty shotgun and fires a carefully aimed barrel at the angel head, however Arael is able to fry the bullet to an itty bitty crisp before it comes within 100 metres. Blaze starts busting some moves before ducking for cover under the angels dive bomb attack; unfortunately for Arael the attack carried the angel too far and it collides with Ancalagon the Black. Cortez looks on as Arael rises up and it and Ancalagon stare each other down. Then, suddenly both their wings eject from their backs and they blast into the air, attacking each other with tooth, lightnings, claw, and flame. Blaze thinks its only fair, and so challenges Cortez to battle. Cortez accepts, and without hesitation slams his rapier down on Blazes head; however Blaze dives away in time. In the above battle, Ancalagon and Arael are in locked combat. Arael strikes Ancalagons belly but thats useless seeing as its completely armoured with mithril and galvorn scales. Ancalagon answers with a chomp to the neck. Arael screams and grips Ancalagons own wings as they topple from the sky and with an almighty crash collapse onto the platform; thankfully the adamantium coating prevents any tumult. Blaze isnt doing too shabby; hes timed Cortezs movements and is able to perfectly avoid any damage from the pirate kings attacks. However Cortez tackles him out of sheer rage and Blaze is piledrived into the ground hard. But thats all right, because the dive bomb from Ancalagon was too much for the angel of light and it exploded in glowing shards, and the glittering dust fades away into nothingness.
Blaze Ya Dead Homie advances to Round 3!
The Ming vs. Cybermen fight will be up soon.
(Message edited by kodster on May 14, 2007)Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
Ming Higurashi vs. Cyberman Army
House fighters are Hamlet & Big Mac.
Ming looks nervous; its herself versus about 3 billion Cybermen, and thats not counting all the Cybermats that they have. So to make things fair, Hamlet travels back in time, and forwards too, and brings back an army of 2,999,999,999 containing British, French, Danish, and Scottish soldiers, Borgs and Klingons, Dwarves, Elves, Hobbits, and even the Cybermens enemies, the Daleks, all soldiers of which holding an usually powerful weapon. An all-out war results, and shortly thereafter Ming meets with the Cybercommander mid-battle. Bitter is the confrontation, as Ming summons a continuous blast of fire from the heat of a thousand suns, however the Cybercommander teleports away. He then fires a death ray from his chest but Ming easily avoids it. Down below, most of the forces have been destroyed by the Cybermen, but Hamlet throws himself into the fray, carving a passage through his destruction, and the tides turn. However, the Cybercommander simply speaks a few mouths into his wrist, and another 3 billion Cybermen arrive. Hamlet repeats bringing more armies, and so its one big battle forever, unless either Ming or the Cybercommander are destroyed. However Ming doesnt seem to be doing that well anymore, as the Cybercommander is somehow draining her energy. She falls to her knees, and the Cybercommander is about to stomp on her when suddenly the Danish prince hurls himself at the commander and tackles him into a battle between a few of his own soldiers and some Daleks and Elves. It seems that Hamlet has taken a liking to the female part-human, and goes red, but he doesnt have time to express his feelings as suddenly the Cybercommander bursts away from the assault and advances on Ming, who is still critically weakened. Hamlet tries to intervene but suddenly is caught by some cybermats and thrown to the ground. The Cybercommander grabs Ming roughly and countless numbers of volts stream through her; normally this would have been the end but Ming is, shall I say, unnatural. She smiles slightly, to the shock of the Cybercommander, and pressing her own hands against the Cybercommander is able to direct the current right back into the Cybercommanders own death ray, which consequently char-broils the metallic general to a crisp. He is just about to give up when he spots a big mac lying in front of him. He scarfs it down in one bite. If he had been a little smarter he wouldve realized that, for one, hes a robot that shouldnt eat organic things, and two, that was the house fighter Big Mac. Suddenly a pair of lungs appear in the metallic body of the Cybercommander. Ming suspects this since there is actually breath, and with the last of her strength, molds some molten rock and metal around the mouth of the Cybercommander, who, despite scrabbling his hands around the molten gag, is unable to remove the suffocating mass of solid substance and the head is blown off in a shower of sparks. Steve and Prof. Vengeance groan in the crowd.
Ming Higurashi advances to Round 3!Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
/me is doing the chicken dance of joy!
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
Woo hoo, I won, I won, I WON!!!
-does Happy Dance-
Told you to rethink your tactics Steve.
ON OT THE NEXT ROUND!!!Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
=P
Dont count Prof. Vengeance out.
Next fights up later today.Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
Slappy Squirrel vs. Hammer Brother
House fighter is the Watcher.
Slappy Squirrel is not at the arena; rather, shes in a video game where you must jump and spit fireballs. Apparently mushrooms make you big, and some of them give you an extra life. Enemies include walking mushrooms with feet, and turtles with giant heads. Slappy begins the first level and is killed by the Goomba instantly, losing one of her three lives. She takes out an anvil when she returns and throws it at the Goomba, killing it as instantly. She jumps and hits a ? block, causing a mushroom to pop out. Unfortunately Slappy hates mushrooms so she blasts it to pieces. She makes it all the way to World 8-3, only losing one more life thanks to falling in the lava in World 4-4 after ducking away from the fire flower that fell. Suddenly shes face to face with her real opponent, the Hammer Brother from the ATTTWI. A crazy battle scene ensues, in which Slappy is utterly defeated and calls upon the Watcher, who is on top of a ? block, to help. The Watcher calls Asterix, but Asterix, once again displaying his kindness for nature, explains to the Watcher that the squirrel and erect-walking turtle are endangered species and that he wont hurt them unless they attack first. So, of course, the Hammer Bro. throws a hammer at Asterix behind his back. It does little except angering the gaul, and he demands to know who threw it. The Bro. points at Slappy, who is tackled in a mid-dive at the Hammer Brother and, after being stomped senseless and hit with random objects including a deep-frying machine, is sent to the Roadkill Cafe to be served on a platter with buffalo chips.
Hammer Brother advances to Round 3!
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Tekkaman vs. Foxpig
House fighters are Obelix and Asterix.
Tekkaman readies his blasters, however the foxpig is randomly chasing his tail. Tekkaman wonders at this but then fires his guns and blasts the foxpig to Kingdom Come. However, many people have said that Kingdom Come actually exists. Some people dont, and use it lightly in jokes. Well this comes back to haunt them as suddenly a huge castle and grassy surroundings appears somewhere in the galaxy, protected by a biosphere, into which the foxpig is blasted. The sphere doesnt break; rather, it absorbs the hybrid into itself, and the foxpig lands on the grass. Tekkaman lifts off from the ground and blasts away after his adversary, however Kingdom Come is a magical place where anything extremely awesome and good can happen, especially for foxpigs, and so the hybrid suddenly develops super strength, speed, agility, and one heck of a bite. Tekkaman lunges forward but suddenly he gets the air knocked out of him by an incoming animal known as Super Foxpig. Tekkaman aims his blaster at the superpowered hybrid however Super Foxpig flies at it and chews it off and swallows it. Not only is Foxpig super strong, but so is his disgestive system. Tekkaman is horrified, but thats only the beginning. Super Foxpig whizzes through the air around the mech warrior, taking great big bites off of the armour. Within a few minutes all thats left of Tekkaman is his head, which Super Foxpig saves for last, and throws it into the audience, where a Piranha Plant devours it whole and dies of severe indigestion.
Foxpig advances to Round 3!
Next up: Stewie Griffin vs. Lord DoomForAll!Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
Yay, go Foxpig! Tactics for next round: do not be too aggressive, his plans fall apart naturally, and interfering may empower him, but still attack a bit, but not directly either as people get sorry for babies.Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
Stewie Griffin vs. Lord DoomForAll
House fighters are Ancalagon and Exa-Gore-Ic.
The toddler and the supreme power of the multiverse glare at each other coldly. They are in the depths of space, and Stewie is wearing his in-expertly made space suit. And then, instantly, they act. Stewie hires some thugs to take down Lord DoomForAll; namely, these thugs are Electro, Sandman, Juggernaut, etc. but Lord DoomForAll takes control of some superheroes such as Sipder-Man, Cyclops, and Hulk, and they have a huge fight in space. Unfortunately its really cold in space and only Juggernaut survives while the others freeze to death. But of course killing off these characters causes second-rate heroes to be placed in their niche, and so Ben Reilly (Scarlet Spider) comes in wearing a cosmic guise and attacks Juggernaut fiercely, beating the crap out of him. But being a hero Ben decides to take on Stewie AND DoomForAll, and in the ensuing chaos the guise is destroyed and Ben Reilly freezes to death. Stan Lee is uncomfortable at this moment, and decides to retire from creating superheroes, and is booed all the way back to his home. Unfortunately for him, Venom appears and hugs him for not wanting to bring Spidey back, and this snaps Lees spine. Venom shrugs and walks away. Back at the real fight, Stewie fires his carbonite gun at DoomForAll, and surprisingly it works, freezing the multioverlord in a block of frozen CO3. Poor Stewie doesnt realize that carbonite is weak compared to the infinite power of the DoomForAll and it breaks apart completely, showing the Lord in all his form. BLAST! cries the Griffin and tries to get away but Lord DoomForAll teleports him to the nearby galaxy evil nursery which is like a prison only for babies. The Lord smirks unpleasantly before teleimploding himself to the other end of the universe, because that is his lair.
Lord DoomForAll (easily) advances to Round 3!
Next fight: Professor Vengeance vs. Jack the Ripper!Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
A.T.T.T.W.I.
ROUND 2
Jack the Ripper VS PROFESSOR VENGEANCE
To this day, the true identity of Jack the Ripper is an enigma, so Im not even sure who Im fighting in this round. A man, a woman, a demon from another dimension - who knows? So the Prof will go on the defensive and try to lure him into a House Fighters area. Whos to say Jackies even flesh and blood after all?
Also, I think the Prof would be wise to invite some particularly insane conspiracy theories along for the ride. Not only could they spill the beans on Jack the Rippers true identity, theyd also make for great distractions and cannon fodder. :wink:Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
I reckon Jack the Ripper probably is an alternate universe Vengeance anyways - same Victorian dress sense and love of villainy...Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
But less global domination.Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
Hehehe...
Professor Vengeance vs. Jack the Ripper
House fighters are Taki & Tira.
Its quite startling to find that nobody knows who Jack really is, even after he sadistically defeated Clover last round. Prof. Vengeance swirls his cape around dramatically, and thrusts out his trusty cane. The deranged surgeon just stands there smiling his evil smile. All of a sudden, the cane ignites with a green flare as thousands of chaos emeralds explode with incredible energy. However, his enemy is motionless, still with the sinister smirk on his face. Prof. Vengeance then circles Jack, like in a fencing match, with the cane outwards, pointing at Jack. Lining up his target with Tira, Vengeance suddenly lunges forward, and the cane impales Jack through the midsection and a bright ball of light explodes through it, and Jack is gauged off of the cane and lands in front of Tira. Prof. Vengeance smirks, knowing that Tira will get the better of Jack and destroy him, but it is not so, however. Tira indeed comes forward ready to send Jack to the land down under (the narrator is fried by Aaron Knight whom Kody throws a chair at while he runs away sniggering), but Jack suddenly reveals his true form; its a giant flag of Holland! Even though Tira is a maniacal killer who attacks first and asks questions later, she was born in Holland and therefore must stand up for her nationality. Martijn is appalled that such a fiend could be born there, but he runs away knowing that the scene here is going to be very violent. Tira turns viciously upon Vengeance and before the Professor can raise his cane a tenth of an inch swats it away with her ring blade, and it skids off the platform and out of sight below. Prof. Vengeance retracts his hand in pain but Tira isnt letting up, bodyslamming him to the ground. Vengeance knows what he must do. He produces a phial of blue liquid and drains it. Instantly, superhuman power courses through his veins, and the Professor rises up, glaring at the girl. Tira charges, and Vengeance meets it with a boot to the face. Taki watches with interest from her folded chair, and after a moments pause grabs her martini and slurps it. Jack the Holland flag levitates above the floor and glides over to Vengeance who is laying the hurt on Tira badly. Vengeance looks around too late, and Jack smothers him, wrapping around him and choking him. Tira, panting, stumbles trying to get up and falls back over, KOD. Jack almost has Vengeance when the Professor finally is able to contact his minions. A few androids fly into the arena. All of them have flamethrowers, and they burn the flag completely, Vengeance tearing it off mid-way through the process. Now all thats left of it is ashes. Professor Vengeance is relieved, and he goes into the audience and waits for the next fight. Martijn, for some strange reason, goes back into the arena and exits, scooping Tira up as he does so. Taki takes another generous sip of martini idly.
Professor Vengeance advances to Round 3!Comment
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Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI
Huzzah and hoorah! As the saying goes, Vengeance is mine!
A.T.T.T.W.I.
ROUND 2
A bowl of custard VS FIFI LAFUME
Boiling, self-replicating custard. How do we come up with this stuff?
Anyways, providing this yellow peril can actually smell, Fifi will once again go on the offence with the tail and skunk-juice the custard beast to high heaven. If that doesnt work (which it almost certainly wont), Fifi will call upon one of her good friends at Acme Looniversity to help out - Mr Dizzy Devil. If he can eat furnature without a single cramp, he can eat my custardy challenger here with little problems.
And if that dont work, she can always just roll around in the custard and try to attract a mate. Shell want to get something out of this tournament.
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